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Those that feel their children's father is a creep............... adult content

Looser, scumbag, whatever you want to call him.
I see a lot of posts about the terrible men that women have had children with.

So how did it come into being that you had a child with him? if it was a case that you didn't know what he was like, how long did you know him before you decided to get serious and have a child?

was it a case where you dated a few times and got pregnant by accident?

*it's marked TMI so you can have more room to say whatever.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:49 AM on Jun. 13, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • I thought (DUHHHHHHH) having a child would "settle" my son's natural father down. It didn't, he just got jealous of the child and worse in his destructive behavior. I learned a long time ago, love is not enough.

    Answer by Dahis at 10:51 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • My bff's baby daddy is an alcoholic. She used to party alot and he was "fun". Not so fun when you have a newborn. They were only seeing eachother for a month when she conceived. He's also ugly as sin, but she had low self esteem and I think she just wanted a baby soooo badly.

    Answer by Shanna84 at 10:54 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • We was married before we decided to have children. Love is blind and people change after marriage.  He got jealous when our first child came along.  After him cheating I knew things would not get better.  He still has not changed.


    Answer by My3Ez at 10:57 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • My friends XH was so super nice until they got married...then he changed...wouldn't let her see her friends anymore...became emotionally and verbally abusive to her...she found out she was prego just a month after the marriage and his behaviors kept getting worse until they became physical. She had to take the baby and leave. It was so bizarre. We used to go to dinner with them and hang out then as soon as they married, she wasn't allowed to see me anymore...or even talk to me on the phone. He wouldn't even let her come to my kid's bday parties anymore. I was so shocked b/c he seemed like such a nice guy before the marriage.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:59 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • I married a sociopath. I had NO way of knowing that he was not what he claimed to be, until it was simply too late.

    Neither of the children from our relationship were conceived willingly. Nice of you to assume though, that all babies born into a family are conceived willingly... ever hear of marital rape? There are only a couple states which will actually prosecute. In NC it is not considered a crime. Rape can not exist within the confines of marriage- in other words, I became his physical property to do with as he wished.
    Literally the moment we were legally married, he said "I own you". Things went from bad, to worse, to life threatening after that.

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 11:06 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • "Nice of you to assume though, that all babies born into a family are conceived willingly... ever hear of marital rape? "
    Oh, I most certainly have. I just didn't go there in the posts. I figured if that was the case for anyone and they wanted to bring it up, then they would.

    it's sometimes hard to word a post in a way that will cover every possible situation.


    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:12 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • Im not in that situation but i have a friend who was dating this guy who was just fined at first then he changed once the baby was born
    but i also believe in the maya angelou quote when someone tell you who they are believe them...meaning 90% of the time their deadbeats when u first meet them. But you live and you learn

    Answer by kyheavensmom at 11:16 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • Well with my first husband I was a teenager so I guess being young and dumb and not even thinking about asking the right questions got me into the situation. I dont think he is a scumbag lol but I do think he is an abusive compulsive liar. We divorced after 12 yrs and I remarried within a yr. I hardly count that marriage. I got pregnant after we married about a year in. I thought i knew him well. EVERYONE loved him. And I do mean EVERYONE. He seemed like the perfect husband. Our life was awesome together. I was really happy with him. But turned out he is a sex addict and was cheating on me almost the entire time. I am not one for second chances & am not going to risk AIDS or an STD for him, so we divorced. I think he is a lying dog. But sometimes people can hide their addictions well.

    Answer by gemgem at 11:20 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • To me it's a matter of people going into a relationship with blinders on (or in some cases just sleeping around and not even knowing the person who is the father of their children). Before you have children with someone (or marry them) you should really know them. If more people did that there would be less of this kind of drama. Sex is not the casual thing our society has made it, and the ones who are suffering the most are the kids from those "casual" hook ups.


    Answer by scout_mom at 11:21 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • I'm pretty bad..i met my ex and moved in the same night...i was 18 so whatever he was my first relationship and he asked the second night if i would have his joke...I wanted a child so I said yeah and a month later I was pregnant...I figured I would get knocked up and move on...i didn't account to how much I would actually want my child to have a dad...things were not perfect,but they were not bad for the first couple yrs...he is an alcoholic and i thought I could change him...3 kids and 5 yrs. never happened...he got worse he got violent and verbally abusive and I left and am now with a wonderful man!

    Answer by happymama02 at 11:25 AM on Jun. 13, 2011

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