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How can i get my 3.5 year old & his 22 month old brother to listen to me?

I fel like I am ALWAYS running on empty, from the time they wake me up till the minute they finally stop fighting it & me & fall asleep. I am a SAHM. I also have a 3 week old baby boy. My husband leaves to work at 5pm & gets home at 3am but then sleeps till 12pm. By the time he wakes up I have been going back & forth with the boys for at least 4-5 hours, so I am frustrated & he gets upset & does not understand. I just need some advice on how to manage this better w/the limited amount of energy I have. It's 6:22pm and I did not even have a moment of free time to shower today before he left to work...HELP!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:23 PM on Jun. 13, 2011 in Parenting Debate

Answers (7)
  • Yell louder? -lol Ok, I know this sux. You are sleep deprived & prob. try to keep them somewhat quiet so daddy can sleep. Kids at that age could make a preacher cuss! :p You should try to have some planned activities for them. Play a hiding game w/ a fav. toy if you are busy w/ the baby. All kids need structure & consistent praise, rewards for good behavior & consequences for bad behavior. Super Nanny has some great ideas you could incorporate according to your needs. Get some rest & start fresh tomorrow. GL! :)
    mrsmom110

    Answer by mrsmom110 at 9:30 PM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • Get a schedule... try to group things that you can... like showers. If you have two boys stick them in the shower together. One big thing is to learn to break things down. So sit down one night and plan your days ahead of time. Like monday might be the day you vacuum or clean the bathrooms. You should only have one major chore a day. The kids are old enough for a sticker chart too. I was completely frazzled until we instilled this. You should choose three things you want him to work on. He starts with one base sticker. Stickers get taken when kids disobey or if you have to say it more that three or four times. The big things with the stickers is consequences and rewards. Be careful what you say, always take a deep breath before you say anything bc if you say all the toys are going to get thrown out then you have to follow through if you want results. Feel free to pm me I have a ton of tricks.
    NightOwlMama

    Answer by NightOwlMama at 9:35 PM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • well, i also have 3 kids (6yo, 3 1/2 and 1 1/2) so i know how it is. my husband works alot and has a very inconsistant schedule so there are days that he is not home at all. what really works for me is having a schedule and having time out. the kids respond very well to a schedule...it improves their behaviour. if they don't behave they get in time out. i do the 'strike three and you're in time out' tactic. the first time i give them a warning is strike one. if they still don't straighten up then i simply say 'strike 2' and if they still keep at it i say 'x minitue time out'. it's one minitue for each year in age. they will go to the time out corner and stand there until i tell them they're done or the timer beeps. if they talk or fool around the timer will be reset. it works really well. i know it's stressful for you. just putting the extra effort into establishing a schedule and following through with the dicipline (cont
    princessbeth79

    Answer by princessbeth79 at 9:36 PM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • will really make a world of difference and you will have much easier days once these things are established. also, if someone is in a rotten mood i send them up to bed for some time to remember their manners or how to share, etc. and tell them they can come back down whenever they are ready. this works great too for situations where they are just being a pain or in a bad mood. sometimes my 3yo will even take a nap and then come back down with his 'happy ears' on (a smile lol). gl....you can do it!
    princessbeth79

    Answer by princessbeth79 at 9:38 PM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • I usally hit the end of my rope and begin saying dumb stuff like "Sit!" "Stay!" and my kids listen!
    cueballsmom

    Answer by cueballsmom at 9:45 PM on Jun. 13, 2011

  • my nine mos old already know sit and stay when I'm getting ready for work in the bathroom. Some ppl may bash about treating them like dogs or something, but you know what? simple commands work, no discussion is needed. Just a word or you need to develop the "mom" look that says listen now or I will sell you :)
    hollydaze1974

    Answer by hollydaze1974 at 11:01 AM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • You are going to have to get organized. When my twins were born I had a 6, 4, 2 and 2 newborns. It wasn't easy. (My husband was a truck driver working 70-80 hours a week) You are going to have to buck up and get organized. You need to prioritize and on those crazy days, only do what you HAVE to do to get through the day. Purge your house. Minimize clutter. Minimize toys. Make sure they get some time outside to wear them out for a good long nap time. Simplify. Simplify. Simplify.
    Dabberdoo

    Answer by Dabberdoo at 6:32 PM on Jun. 25, 2011

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