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SON'S STEP MOM, AFTER 20+- YEARS CONTINUES TO BE NASTY, WHY IS THAT?

OUR SON IS GETTING MARRIED, HE IS ALMOST 30 AND FEELS HE HAS FOUND HIS SOUL MATE, AFTER NEVER GETTING A POLITE HELLO FROM HIS STEP MOM WE ARE NOW GOING TO BE AT THE WEDDING .. THIS SHOULD BE INTERESTING

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FlMomXs3

Asked by FlMomXs3 at 8:24 AM on Jun. 14, 2011 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 2 (9 Credits)
Answers (16)
  • Maybe she was born that way! honestly, some people are just nasty and mean the minute they come out of the womb,, I guess it is pretty good karma that your ex hubbs has to live with the witch everyday,, LOL! Have a great time at the wedding!
    kimigogo

    Answer by kimigogo at 8:28 AM on Jun. 14, 2011

  • maybe shes just threatened by u....enjoy ur sons wedding and dont let her ruin it for u
    zperez0809

    Answer by zperez0809 at 8:31 AM on Jun. 14, 2011

  • I have for so many years attempted to be friendly with her. She has gone thru some cancer issues & I always wished her the best even through our son but she always returned a nasty 'o sure she wishes me the best'. I mean we must have SOMETHING in common we both married the same man. Sometimes I feel like she should be telling me thank u, if I had not divorced her husband she would not be where she is today. He found her in AA, thank goodness for them both. I took nothing from the marriage except my clothes, car and child. Left a wealthy fortune for her to enjoy and she does that far better than I did. Our sons father is a very wealthy man from a family business but when we were married he had far more drinking issues than I saw in the 1st year 2gether, by the time the divorce came about I was over it & just left. She is just plain nasty. I always thought being a Grandmother would be great, but sharing with her will b UGGGGG
    FlMomXs3

    Comment by FlMomXs3 (original poster) at 8:53 AM on Jun. 14, 2011

  • Maybe you should stop trying to be nice to her. Maybe the only other people who have ever been nice to her have wanted something from her and taken advantage of her. The woman married a man she met at AA: what are the chances that she doesn't have big time issues. Maybe you should just leave her alone. I have a relative who always asks about another relative. The other relative feels like she is being stalked. Just drop it. If you pretend she isn't there she will pretend you aren't there and there will be no more rudeness.  That is probably what she is used to: pretending she isn't there and there is no problem. Unless your son thinks this woman walks on water the only woman you will be sharing grandmotherhood with is the bride's mother.

    LoveMyDog

    Answer by LoveMyDog at 9:35 AM on Jun. 14, 2011

  • I have left this woman alone for almost 20 years. I'm sure she has some issues but why do they have to be nasty? The soon to be D I Law fam lives up North. I certainly will not let this ruin my time at the wedding, it's just sad .. why can't we just all get along :-/
    FlMomXs3

    Comment by FlMomXs3 (original poster) at 9:53 AM on Jun. 14, 2011

  • I haven't tried to communicate with her since about a year after they married. She was nasty then so I just let it go. Just seems that now after all these years whatever her malfunctions were would have relaxed. I've been married since that divorce but divorced again, I always got along well with the women in my last ex's life but this one really gets to me for some reason. Sometimes I think that her financial status allows her to feel like she is better than me. Why do people let money go to their heads? They do seem to toss their funds around to gain popularity. But that makes those takers no better. I just hope the soon to be D I Law isn't in this for the money. Time will tell. Want to ask my son if he has a pre nup, bad idea or good idea???
    FlMomXs3

    Comment by FlMomXs3 (original poster) at 10:08 AM on Jun. 14, 2011

  • You won't be sharing the grandma role with her anyway. You will be one of TWO grandmothers, she will be grandpa's wife or step grandma. Have you talked to your son about how he wants the wedding to go? Is he close to her? Does he expect you to share the mother of the groom role?
    JLS2388

    Answer by JLS2388 at 10:30 AM on Jun. 14, 2011

  • I know we will be 2 different Grandma's no doubt. Our son says there will be a great distance between us at the wedding. He is always cordial to her as she is his fathers wife, she plays the poor me syndrome sometimes, they have had their ups and downs but who hasn't. They have not always been close but he's not real vocal about her. She was nasty to the soon to be D I Law at first but has soon warmed up. There hasn't been much chat as of yet regarding mother of the groom role(s). The wedding is in September. We will see. The soon to be D I Law wants this to be all fancy and lavish which is fine for what she wants, our son would go along with a small beachside wedding and use the funds for a house, bills, college loans. O joy joy
    FlMomXs3

    Comment by FlMomXs3 (original poster) at 10:49 AM on Jun. 14, 2011

  • Do you realize that everytime you say "our son" rather than "my son"? Even to go so far as to say "our son's father" Who exactly are you sharing this boy with his father or his step-mother?
    LoveMyDog

    Answer by LoveMyDog at 1:51 PM on Jun. 14, 2011

  • I had a step grandma. I liked her better than the regular one.
    Ihearthorses

    Answer by Ihearthorses at 7:45 PM on Jun. 14, 2011

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