Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

Baby number 2?

DH took me out to dinner today and brought up the subject of TTC number two. DS just turned 3 and he said if we're going to do it, now is the time because they won't be too far apart in age. Up until about 3 weeks ago he was adamately against having any more and now he's set on ONE more.

I'm really unsure...I used to want another one but the thought of going through everything (not the labor/birth/infancy, more the toddler years) makes me dizzy. There are so many pros and cons on both sides...DH told me it was totally up to me, he just wanted me to know his desire.

If you have more than one, child, how is it? Do they get along? Is it hard to deal with? Did it affect your relationship with your hubby or first child?

If you only have one, are you happy with your decision? Do you wish you could have had another one??

Answer Question

Asked by AidensMommy608 at 8:51 PM on Jun. 14, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 6 (140 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • I have a two year old, 10 month old and am pregnant with my third...we always wanted a big family and always wanted them close. I remember being pregnant with #2 and worrying if I was going to be giving #1 less attention or if I could love another as much as my first...and then I found out that the love is just as strong, and as I watch my kids interact now I'm happy that I have given them siblings. It's the best thing in the world to watch my girls laughing at each other. :) I can't imagine only having one. each their own. Everyone has to do what's best for their family.

    Answer by cdecker83 at 8:54 PM on Jun. 14, 2011

  • I have two. We had them really close together (15 months apart), and I am glad they are so close in age. They get along well, the younger one admires the older and the older adores the younger, they will start school a year apart (so I can go back!), and they play with one another so they aren't lonely when I have to get some housework done. They DO have their fights and bickers just like any other siblings, and I have to admit it was difficult having them so close together (I was tired all the time for about the first year), but I think it's totally worth it! ....and to be honest I really want another right now, but know it's not the best time.

    Answer by Kword at 8:58 PM on Jun. 14, 2011

  • I have a 4 yr old and a 2 week old...I'm happy with my decision to have another one...although to be fair since he's still a newborn and all he does is eat and sleep I may change my mind once he starts crawling and getting into stuff daughter seems to be a little jealous though and has been doing things that she KNOWS are wrong...I'm thinking for attention, so that has been a challenge and I'm also feeling a little lonely...but I hear that's just baby blues and will go away soon....good luck with your decision mama

    Answer by Lucky209 at 8:59 PM on Jun. 14, 2011

  • We had always planned on having two. In Plan A, we figured we would TTC when our oldest turned a year old. His first birthday came, and I was in no way ready to have another. We started TTC when he turned two and had our second baby a week after our first son's third birthday. It was a HUGE adjustment at first. Going from having no kids to having one was so easy compared to having our second. The first few months were really rough on me. After that, it got easier. This month they will be 9 and 6, and I'm so glad I have them both. They really are best friends, and I have to say I am so close to my youngest. I know my oldest wouldn't have known the difference if we had stopped at one child, but I'm so glad he has his little brother, and so is he. Also when they are older and my husband and I are gone, they will still have each other for family.

    Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 9:05 PM on Jun. 14, 2011

  • I have two kids they are 2 years apart. At first of course, it's different and maybe even a little difficult. My son was so jealous of his baby sister, he was flat out mean to her for a while. The older she got the more he got used to her and now they play together quite well (most of the time) he still has his moments when he steals toys from her etc. but she loves him so much - she has since she was born. Always a big smile when he'd come in the room. They are so cute together now, he holds her hand when we walk in a parking lot - all protective. I really like the fact that they'll have a sibling to count on later in life - it will be an adjustment but it can be wonderful too.

    Answer by Pollymom at 9:17 PM on Jun. 14, 2011

  • I have two kids. My son is 3.5 years older than his sister, and it works out wonderfully. They've always been good friends. Yes, they'll bicker and fight like cats and dogs, but just let anyone try to hurt one of my kids......

    The best thing about having them at this age difference is that my son was (and is) an amazing helper with his little sister. He LOVED helping the doc measure my tummy, and he melted into a puddle of goo the first time he helped find the heartbeat.

    I'm not saying it's all rainbows and light. My kids have their moments of being little shitheads, but I wouldn't go back and change anything.

    Answer by Rosehawk at 9:33 PM on Jun. 14, 2011

  • I have two. Sometimes they get along, sometimes they don't. Same with some days its easy, some days it isnt, Motherhood is really a roller coaster. They keep each other company even on the bad days and love each other a lot, always looking out for the other. Sometimes I find it easier bc DS will occupy DD while I do laundry or something. However, sometimes when he is occupying her its teaching her how a pair can do twice as much destruction! I think you just gotta know you will have twice the good and twice the bad and ask your self what you are willing to put up with to have twice as many smiles as you do now.

    Answer by GirlWithANikon at 12:16 AM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • i have a 3 year old & an 8 week old. its not as hard as i thought it would be. sure waking up w/ the baby all night & then being up w/ a preschooler all day is hard, but other than that its a lot like having one kid (well so far). my oldest loves the baby & she's very good w/ him, but i can tell its been a big adjustment for her...not having momma all to herself anymore. my relationship w/ DH hasnt really changed other than normal "new baby" tiredness on my part. but for all the exhaustion (cause its twice what it was the first time) its worth it b/c i know in a few years it will be so nice for them to have each other to play w/ & depend on...cause even tho my little bro & i rarely got along, it was nice to know i always had somebody.

    Answer by okmanders at 8:59 AM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • To each, their own

    Answer by Wanabmommy at 12:47 PM on Jun. 20, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.