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How do I teach my 20 month old that fits dont solve everything?

She just wants to throw fits, which I know if typical but what do I do, do I punish her, yell, ignore her ( as in pretend she isnt throwing a fit, not neglecting her) idk Im lost at this point.

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Reesesmomma2009

Asked by Reesesmomma2009 at 10:28 PM on Jun. 14, 2011 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 3 (17 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • Tell her that as soon as she is done then she can come to you and you and she can discuss what was bothering her, then calmly walk away and do something else.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 10:29 PM on Jun. 14, 2011

  • my son is 19mos and I have taught him that fits don't solve ANYTHING. I just let him throw the fit. When he is calm enough to come to me he does and then I look for solutions.
    DomoniqueWS

    Answer by DomoniqueWS at 10:31 PM on Jun. 14, 2011

  • Ignore the fits, just make sure she is ok. She is really not old enough to understand punishment yet. You can also try and distract her. Yelling isn't going to solve anything. When she is calm teach her ways to handle anger, etc. As she gets older you can teach her more and remember that she learn more by imitation than anything. So make sure you are handling anger and other emotions in an appropriate manner.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 10:31 PM on Jun. 14, 2011

  • she 20 months old.. punishing and yelling are only going to make matters worse.

    Instead redirect her attention. She's yelling and carrying on because she gets a reactions from you... she just wants attention. She's still basically a baby and doesn't know how to express her emotions yet. Why not try interacting more with her.. play games revolving around emotions, (making faces at her and explaining what they are, like make a happy face and say HAPPY!! then a sad face etc..) This will help her learn to properly express her emotions better.
    xxhazeldovexx

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 11:02 PM on Jun. 14, 2011

  • We have a cry chair. If you start to throw a fit, that is where you go till your done. Our 15 mo old has recently had his first trip to the cry chair. I take him there, set him down, walk away, and if he gets back out, I put him back without saying anything. Works well with our older ones too.
    daughteroftruth

    Answer by daughteroftruth at 1:23 AM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • My mom would ignore my brother and I when we threw fits. Basically as if she couldnt hear us. If it got way out of hand she would tell us to go to our room and when we were done we could come out and talk to her normally. When my daughter throws fits I tell her that I cant understand her when she's screaming and crying and she usually calms down enough to talk to me.
    SMG1120

    Answer by SMG1120 at 1:39 PM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • Time outs! They get a minute for each year. My son is 2 1/2, so he has to be good for 2 minutes before time out is over. Now, if he's throwing a fit in his room, kicking, yelling, anything like that, well that doesn't count. Lets say he throws a fit in time out for 5mins then finally starts to calm down, THAT'S when I start the 2mins. He understands that time out isn't over when he's being bad, only when he's being good.
    ours

    Answer by ours at 7:16 PM on Jun. 15, 2011

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