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2 Bumps

So my s/o and i have been together for 5 years we both have a daughter that we brought into the relationship that are now 9 and we have a 2year old together. i really want another like now and i def do not want them to be spaced out like our are now. but my s/o thinks that we should wait and "perpare" which makes no sense to me. do u think that maybe he just doesnt want to have another one?

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Asked by Anonymous at 9:35 AM on Jun. 15, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (5)
  • I would sit down and ask exactly what preparations he wants to make. Is it a certain amount of money he wants saved, a bigger house, etc. and when those conditions are met, then you can have one.

    Answer by missanc at 9:36 AM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • A lot of women may tell you to wait. Seems the trend of having children is not the 30s, I keep reading that 20s is too young, however we never know what may happen. I had such a hard time getting pregnant that if I didn't start young, I wouldn't have had the children that I do. And there is a lot of women having problems today, otherwise we wouldn't have TTC boards all over the internet. While I agree with having children early and close together you have to find what is best for both of you. If two people do not want a baby, then there are problems. These things should be discussed before marriage. And it depends on what your prepare means. Are you able to afford the ones that you have?

    Answer by attap5 at 9:39 AM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • I think you need to dig deeper and find out why he said that. I can't answer that for him. He could have meant he's just not emotionally ready for another kid, or that he feels you don't have the funds for a new baby again. Could be worried about a number of things really.. but you'll have to ask him..

    a good idea is to sit down together and both write out a list.. 5 pros to having a kid and 5 cons to having a kid right now.. then go over them together and weigh out the issues

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 10:19 AM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • I think that if one wants one and one doesn't the one who doesn't wins.. I agree with xxhazeldove, I think you need to dig deeper into why he doesn't want one, 3 kids is alot, and perhaps he is worried about money, Maybe he is worried about his daughter feeling left out. Maybe he wants you to get married first? I think you just need to have a long talk about his reasoning, and don't dismiss them if he opens up to you! Good luck-and hey practicing is always fun!

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:43 AM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • I agree that you two should have a long talk about it.

    Answer by Tink05215 at 6:43 PM on Jun. 15, 2011

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