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2 Bumps

Is there something wrong with me?

My husband not affectionate. Physically or verbally. He does not hug or kiss me and only touches me when HE wants sex. Which is about once a month. I am 5'6 and 150 lbs so I am not fat. I am fairly good looking and can be fun. I am aching for attention. I try to tell him how I feel and he just ignores me or laughs. I have consider he's cheating. I don't think he is cuz he's at work all the time then comes home. I want sex everyday, seriously. I have tried dressing sexy, tried seducing him. It sucks when I touch him and he turns over and goes to sleep. I am to the point that I just wish I was with someone who loved me more. Or at least expressed it.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:32 AM on Jun. 15, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • Was he always like that?
    Dahis

    Answer by Dahis at 10:36 AM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • Maybe theres' something more to it. Could he maybe be having some problems that you're not aware of?
    tspillane

    Answer by tspillane at 10:36 AM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • If it isn't an affair, then he needs a medical check up. I would make the appointment aand go with him. When he asks why, be honest. It is time to get the truth out, this is not fair to you, his wife.
    ochsamom

    Answer by ochsamom at 10:37 AM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • What was it like when you were dating? How long have you been married? I think if this is a change, it is very odd. I would ask/demand you all seek some form of counseling, is he affectionate with your children?
    kimigogo

    Answer by kimigogo at 10:39 AM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • kimigogo- I have been married 18 years and we show each other we love each other all the time. I don't think it has ti do with how long she has been married. He may be cheating with someone at work.
    dancer

    Answer by dancer at 10:42 AM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • I was feeling that way and I did some research. Most men need mental stimulation. Such as giving him praise about working so much. He may be one of those men who shows his love by going to work to provide for his family. My husband was/is that way. I tell him from time to time how much I appreciate his hard work. I will sometime make his favorite meal or get him some Dominos wings (they're his favorite). I do little things like stick little love notes in his work hat or his lunch so he will think about me at some point during the day. I tell him how sexy he is. I've become more submissive not sex wise but by taking care of the home and the kids. I read the book "The Love Dare" from the movie "Fireproof". I would recommend it for you to read. Maybe even watch the movie alone then get the book and do the love dare on him. Hope this helps and hope it all works out.
    luvmygrlz

    Answer by luvmygrlz at 10:45 AM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • Maybe it has nothing to do with your appearance at all. And if he has always been this way, nine times out of ten, he will not change...
    mom2mybabes

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 11:08 AM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • I'd be asking him what's up? I'd also ask him what I'm supposed to do to get my needs met? It's part of the marriage contract to take care of your needs. He needs to step up to the plate or tell you how he expects you to get those needs met.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:28 AM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • Yes, you need to get this out in the open. You're wanting the situation to be different but you need to know WHY it is this way, first.
    You're going to have to ask what's the matter? Is it you? Is it him? Is he low on testosterone? (in other words, does he need a medical checkup) Do you think there COULD BE someone else? You say he's always working, are you 100% positive? I'm not trying to put things in your head but we have to consider that ...the way things are today with internet, cell phn texting etc etc...it's easier than ever to get something going outside a marriage and none's the wiser for a long time. Just saying....I'd cover every base!! Do you boost HIS ego? My husband needs to be told how wonderful he is all the time....daily almost and I love telling him because I belief HE IS. He just needs this. He needs my hands on him when he is home...touch, hugs, kisses etc. IDK your hubby's personality at all.
    KellyGirl_TX

    Answer by KellyGirl_TX at 12:06 PM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • I ran out of typing space but.....I wish you all the best. It sounds like you really, really want and need your husbands physical and mental attention and are not getting much of anything. You've GOT to find out why. That would devastate me if I dressed all sexy for my man and he rolled over time after time and turned his back to me. OmG. That would sting for sure.
    I have to ask the same thing others wanted to know. Was he like this before marriage? When you were newlyweds? Do you think it's a big change in the last year or less ? There's alot we don't know about him and his regular habits previous.
    Bless your heart and I hope you find answers......marriage can be such a beautiful thing but...it DOES take work for both , some more, some less. Good Luck to you! ok?
    KellyGirl_TX

    Answer by KellyGirl_TX at 12:12 PM on Jun. 15, 2011

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