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2 Bumps

How the heck do you date being a single mom....

how do you find someone to date? and when you do, do they pay for the sitter? i am a single mom and my attitude is coming down to ... i refuse to pay to date the men dont seem worth it.

Answer Question
 
austinpierce

Asked by austinpierce at 1:48 PM on Jun. 15, 2011 in Relationships

Level 6 (126 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • I met my husband at school. I tried online dating and went out with one or two men, but only once. I had one of my friends set me up with a friend of hers. I did not get a sitter, I only went on dates when my kids were with their dad.
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 1:51 PM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • very carefully lol...
    would be nice if they paid for the sitter huh... lol..
    good luck..
    girlglow6

    Answer by girlglow6 at 1:53 PM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • no you should pay for the sitter, it'd be unfair to him to pay for a date he doesn't even know yet, plus what if he ends up not liking you then he'll really feel resentful. ask a girlfriend to watch your child for an hour or two she should understand
    lizzybee44

    Answer by lizzybee44 at 2:25 PM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • you should pay for the sitter and if he invites he pays but if its a mutual okay then you can go dutch too.
    lucky35

    Answer by lucky35 at 3:00 PM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • you should pay your sitter, keep your pants on... slow your role... spend time to get to know this person better. I know I am going off the road here... we can't go expecting these guys to be thinking the way we do... only if they offer to do so.... where ya'll going???? um noisey
    miamoma

    Answer by miamoma at 5:09 PM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • I forgot to answer the question how do you date? it has to come to you unexpectedly... you know a healthy not a lusty, going out there looking for a man thing. sometimes we spend time thinking we need to bring someone in our lives when we really don't at the time... one day some guy is going to walk into your life... you will know if it is right or not. I know one thing when you go looking... it ain't good girl
    miamoma

    Answer by miamoma at 5:12 PM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • When I was single, I only dated other single dads so they could relate and were looking for the same things as me. I had a 50 50 custody situation with my ex, so I would date on the days I didn't have her. Or I would have lunch or coffee dates that didn't impact the time I was with her. If you don't have that situation, maybe you could trade off with a good friend who has kids too. You kids could have a playdate with another family and you'd return the favor to them at another time.
    kathyartist2007

    Answer by kathyartist2007 at 5:31 PM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • You pay for the sitter, they are your children.
    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 7:04 PM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • You pay for your sitter, or in my case, my parents always wanted to watch my kids, so my dates were a welcome thing to them. :)

    As for how to do it...well, I used to do online dating. I thought it gave me a chance to get to know someone a bit better before taking time from my children to go out with them. But, given that I'm in the process of leaving an abusive relationship with a man I met online, I don't think I'd go that route again. I'd stick with asking friends to set me up, or a random meeting at the supermarket, at work, or out bowling or whatever. Of course, that won't be for a very long time, considering my circumstances.

    Oh, and I am answering this anonymously only because I'm afraid my abusive partner may see this with my name and I am trying really hard to keep him from finding out I am leaving until after I'm gone.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:06 PM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • what about a family members or close friend to watch the kids for free? Maybe you have a single friend who has kids herself and she goes on dates. Maybe do a swap with the kids so it give you both a chance to get out.
    SnapIt

    Answer by SnapIt at 12:50 AM on Jun. 16, 2011

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