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2 Bumps

EMOTIONAL CIVIL WAR

I WANT TO CRY A LOT ABOUT LEAVING JERK FACE(DH) DOES THIS EVEN HELP OR DOES IT JUST MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER?

WHY AM I HAVING A FIGHT WITH MYSELF ABOUT STAYING WITH HIM OR LEAVING HIM ALL TOGETHER AND STARTING OVER. BEING HAPPY AND HALTHY ALL AROUND. NO MORE ABUSE AND HAVING TO BE IN SERVIVAL MODE WHEN HE IS AROUND.

WHY WOULD I WANT TO STAY WITH SOMEONE LIKE THAT IT HAS NOT WORKED. MADE IT HARD TO BE WITH FAMILY AND FRIENDS. WHY AM I HAVING THIS ARGUMENT WITH MYSELF CAN SOMEONE TELL ME?

SORRY FOR BEING LAME EVERYONE

Answer Question
 
Liveatmo

Asked by Liveatmo at 10:36 PM on Jun. 15, 2011 in Relationships

Level 7 (207 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • U aren't being lame and quit beating yourself up. When we are with someone, even if they suck, it is our security blanket. Leaving is hard but you can do it!
    emmyandlisa

    Answer by emmyandlisa at 10:39 PM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • Its not being lame. Women that are constantly abused tend to make excuses or blame themselves for the excuse its not uncommon. I found an interesting article that may help out.http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-scientific-fundamentalist/200804/why-do-some-battered-women-stay
    natashafairy

    Answer by natashafairy at 10:41 PM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • Abuse will always escalate over time. The more they get away with it the more of it they dish out. You are not lame. He has conditioned you to doubt yourself. I bet he tells you you're nothing without him. It is psychological warfare. Get out while you can. Good luck.

    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 10:43 PM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • thank you i will look at it i guess crying never hurt anyone.
    Liveatmo

    Comment by Liveatmo (original poster) at 10:46 PM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • Crying is cathartic. It helps to cleanse your emotions, your heart, and your head. Let it out. Give yourself the time you need to heal.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:32 PM on Jun. 15, 2011

  • Its not lame crying is some what theraputic if you need to cry to get through this then cry some of the strongest women cry. Crying cleans the soul. As a woman we are more sensitive then men therefore more emotional so crying is absoultly natural and as far as the abuse if you can get out now do so you no doubt are a bueatiful woman and doesnt deserve to be treated that way at all
    MsSmoove

    Answer by MsSmoove at 12:59 AM on Jun. 16, 2011

  • were you mad when you wrote this? if yes then that's why
    lizzybee44

    Answer by lizzybee44 at 3:28 AM on Jun. 16, 2011

  • no i was not mad i just had caps lock on and did not feel llke changing it... i dont think was mad i was a ball of emotions mostly hurt and lost.
    Liveatmo

    Comment by Liveatmo (original poster) at 1:46 PM on Jun. 16, 2011

  • Get the book Why Does He Do That? it can explain a lot of things. And you aren't lame. Get help to learn how to focus your emotions, even start writing a journal.
    Sithpadawans

    Answer by Sithpadawans at 3:54 PM on Jun. 16, 2011

  • You have to get yourself and the kids out asap. Find out where the local dv shelter is and go there. They will help you and get an RO also citing that you fear for yourself and the children if he is around. Then file for welfare and housing. If you can get out without him being home, that is great. Have an escape plan and have a bag packed and stashed somewhere he won't find it. Your parent's house or a trusted friend that will not tell anyone else. If you can't get a bag packed and stashed, just keep yours and the kids birth certificates, ss cards and medical cards on you. The more you are away from him and not talking to him, the better you are going to be able to get your mind together and be able to be you again and be a good mom.

    You cannot let this keep happening and you can't keep letting the kids see it happening. It will get worse. Who will protect your children if you are dead? You can live free without him.
    Sithpadawans

    Answer by Sithpadawans at 7:40 PM on Jun. 16, 2011

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