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My SO and I have been together for 3 1/2 years. I don't have any desire for sex.

I love him very much but I could care less about doing the do. Everything was fine until 2 months ago. That's when he came back home. We were seperated over the summer. His choice, not mine. I cried and did everything I could. Well, he came back ( b/c he loves me and we really did need to fix some things) but since he's been back it's like I avoid him in anyway I can. What happened?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:34 AM on Dec. 12, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • It sounds like you guys need to start working on the "things" that need working on NOW. If you're to ever get the intimacy back then you need to work past the problems. Here's what I do if I'm feeling like you. I think of the days back when I first met my husband. Oh he was so gorgeous. He made me so happy and I felt blessed to have him love me back. Talk to eachother about the old days. Remind eachother of fun intimate times you've had. I find that it works for both of us if I describe a particularly good session of sex that we had. That usually get's things going big time. If you want more ideas then message me. I'll help you and not judge you at all.
    MarlyeGirl

    Answer by MarlyeGirl at 6:07 AM on Dec. 12, 2008

  • You said YOU'RE avoiding him... why do you feel bad? Do you feel you don't deserve intimacy?
    MarlyeGirl

    Answer by MarlyeGirl at 6:08 AM on Dec. 12, 2008

  • I think I resent him for leaving. I am pissed that he left even though I was being a real control freak and pretty bitchy. I don't want to be mad, but I went 4 months of thinking he was never coming back. And then he did, out of nowhere. We were shuffling our son around and he would stay here on the weekends so I could work.. I get off late. We would have sex. I was willing to do anything to get him back. But nothing was working. One Monday night he says I'm coming home Friday. And he was home the next day.
    CM2TX08

    Answer by CM2TX08 at 6:14 AM on Dec. 12, 2008

  • So much for anon LOL. I kinda felt stupid asking. But I really need to find my way back to him.
    CM2TX08

    Answer by CM2TX08 at 6:15 AM on Dec. 12, 2008

  • i wish i could help i have same prob im sorry.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:22 AM on Dec. 12, 2008

  • we didnt seperate or anything, but we went threw hell together. some bad choices both ways, and now i dont feel that sexual attraction. so i really cant help but support so you now your not alone. i do the deed, or just pleasure him and im fine with out a recipicule.
    Shannon85

    Answer by Shannon85 at 9:18 AM on Dec. 12, 2008

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