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I've been a step mom for two years now. Im more structured and assertive then what his kids are used too. How do I find a balance?

His kids are 18, 16 and 10. Mine are 14 and 10.

Answer Question
 
cluemein

Asked by cluemein at 1:41 AM on Jun. 16, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 7 (196 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • If you feel that you are teaching them right continue to be yourself.
    Sarah961

    Answer by Sarah961 at 1:48 AM on Jun. 16, 2011

  • I agree with Sarah961. If you are treating all the kids the same and you really feel that what you are doing is right, then go ahead and be who you are! I wish more parents(and step parents) were assertive and 'tough' on their kids!
    lovingmy4babies

    Answer by lovingmy4babies at 8:57 AM on Jun. 16, 2011

  • U just continue doing what ur doing. Just because your sp doesn not mean ur not a parent. I have rules in my home that my girls follow and when my SS comes here he follows the same rules. Your home and ur time with the SK.kids need structure and need to be taught respect. Teachers demand it and their not the parents.
    fancypantswife

    Answer by fancypantswife at 9:15 AM on Jun. 16, 2011

  • I get told that they have been brought up diff. That my kids are used to my way and his arent. Derrr
    cluemein

    Comment by cluemein (original poster) at 11:58 AM on Jun. 16, 2011

  • Youve got to work this out with DH. You need to combine your styles in a way you can both get behind. If you do not enforce the same rules than you will lose the respect/ discipline in your household. All kids must be equals, this includes equal punishments. Dont forget, what youre trying to create here is a family. Not a picture perfect family, but a home where everyone feels cared about and the boundaries are clear.
    Ms.Gwen

    Answer by Ms.Gwen at 2:12 PM on Jun. 16, 2011

  • We definately have some work to do :)
    cluemein

    Comment by cluemein (original poster) at 2:43 PM on Jun. 16, 2011

  • Your house, your rules. Step-children should be expected to follow the same rules as your children when everyone is under your roof. Your husband should back you up on this 100%.
    Molly4630

    Answer by Molly4630 at 3:16 PM on Jun. 16, 2011

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