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I'm going crazy w/ my Mother-in-law I need some advise bad!!

I have a 3 yr. old daughter & 4 yr. old son. When I had my lil girl my Mother-in-law acted excited to finally have a girl in the fam but when we got her home she wouldn't have much to do w/ her. She thinks the world of my son & would do anything for him. I let it slide when she came w/ toys, clothes ect. for him & her nothing. I just thought shes too young to notice. But as she got older it got worse so I told her if she couldn't buy for both not to bother buying anything. She finds ways around it she will go buy him something great & show up w/ something cheap for her. Thats not all she doesn't play w/ her, she ignores her, if she gets hurt she acts aggravated & tells her oh shut up your fine but if its him she babies the heck outta him. How do I put a stop to her treating her this way? I have tried everything I can think of..I don't wanna keep my kids from seeing her they both love her so much. I'm at my wits end I need some advise please!


Asked by Anonymous at 10:49 AM on Jul. 12, 2008 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • Tell her she is harming the children and until she can treat them fairly - not spoiling him, not treating her like dirt - she can't see them. And stick to it. It sounds like your hubby is ready to do this, so you need to get on board. Yes, they love her. But they do not need her destructive influence. How soon will your son start to treat his sister badly because grandma does? How soon will he start to think he is better than her because grandma thinks so.

    Answer by kaycee14 at 4:20 PM on Jul. 12, 2008

  • Have your husband talk to her....

    Answer by SAHMinIL at 10:52 AM on Jul. 12, 2008

  • He has tried but she just keeps telling him she loves them both the same and they end up in a big fight. So nothing gets accomplished. He has threatened to keep her from ever seeing them again but I dont want it to have to come down to that. I cant stand the woman but my kids love her and I dont want to take that away from them. Its sad though to watch my lil girl try so hard to get mamaws attention and love and even though she gets nothing in return she always keeps trying. :(

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:05 AM on Jul. 12, 2008

  • Well then I would say that if she's going to buy "gift" that it need to be things the kids need like clothing....

    We got tired of all the crap and the cheap plastic toys. We had some relatives that would spend $30-40 on cheap dollar toys for the kids vs. just one nice toy. I would just say that we are "decluttering the house" and feel the kids do not need any more toys etc...however if you feel like getting them something clothing would be nice they could always use clothing. We just don't want any more toys.... it helped us out.

    Answer by SAHMinIL at 11:24 AM on Jul. 12, 2008

  • or just money so you can put it in a saving for the kids.... both of my kids have savings accounts.... so that works for us too. :)

    Answer by SAHMinIL at 11:26 AM on Jul. 12, 2008

  • I would take all grandma priviliges away... If she can't be a good grandma to both the children, give her a time out....

    Answer by pupmom at 12:00 PM on Jul. 12, 2008

  • sounds like husband need to grow some and close the door on mom. if shes overbearing ,it is better if you take a break and see what happens. my mil is overbearing and me and kids moved away and quit depending on her and now i know im happier wout her all the time

    Answer by shannon401 at 1:18 PM on Jul. 12, 2008

  • Your right I dont guess I really thought of it like that. Thanks!

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:48 PM on Jul. 12, 2008

  • Your right, I guess I never really thought of it like that. Thanks alot!

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:49 PM on Jul. 12, 2008

  • Wow that is a tough one! First have your husband ask her why she is doing this... Second, make it seem like you are too busy to see her for a while. Then when you do have a minute to be at home with the kids, it will be easy for you to say, "We are pretty worn out from the busy schedule we have been on lately, we're just not up for company." Then maybe since she hasnt seen the kids for a few weeks, she may come around. Good Luck with your situation!

    Answer by taracv at 9:06 PM on Jul. 12, 2008