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How would you explain sex to your kids if they ask?

I went for a walk with my niece and she asked: "what is sex?" I said ask your mom. But I know I don't have the luxury of deflecting that responsibility with my own kid.

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Asked by miabug at 7:50 PM on Jun. 17, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 4 (51 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • It really depends on the age of the child what my answer would be. As they get older and older it would be closer to what actually happens. If my toddler asks then it would be a much more vague answer.

    Answer by Melbornj at 7:52 PM on Jun. 17, 2011

  • Depends on the age, I wouldn't tell a child thats not mine though lol. By 12 or 13 they need the "sex talk" and reminded weekly ha ( I was a teen mom..twice) if they are younger then that I'd just tell them it's something mommy and daddy share together. Luck my kids are too young to even ask and just learning to talk.

    Answer by letlovegrow2524 at 7:57 PM on Jun. 17, 2011

  • I would always go with the truth and if you think they are too young, then you address the issue with the truth adapted to their age. Or you go to the library and read up on it with age appropriate books.

    Answer by older at 8:18 PM on Jun. 17, 2011

  • well my DD is 3 so if she asked me id be very "when 2 grown ups love each other very much they show it w/ their bodies in a grown ups only way" or something like that. i dont plan on beating around the bush when they ask me these kinda questions, but im not going to be graphic & detailed until they are older. most kids dont want a long explanation at mine's age.

    Answer by okmanders at 8:51 PM on Jun. 17, 2011

  • 13 is late to tell a kid what sex is, there are kids that age pregnant. It really depends on the age and development of the child. My son has known what sex is since he was about 6. In a description that is right for his age. He is now almost 15 and he is well educated and knows about protection too. Nothing was ever told in graphic detail. I have talked to friends kids too, with their permission.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 8:57 PM on Jun. 17, 2011

  • I was always and open with mine and gave age appropriate answers. We have a farm now, so my youngest is pretty versed in the reproduction department. She's 8. The older ones who are 25, 24 and 21 I just told them like it is and explained that it is something that God gives as a gift to a married couple, not to be spoiled before hand. The only true enjoyment coming from sex is if it is waited for by two people special to one another. That's why there is so many people that are dissatisfied, because we spoiled it. It is also not something that should be done by people who are not ready to face the consequences of their actions. IE: be prepared to raise a baby. Any technical questions that I could not answer I would take out a book. I tried drawing a uterus once, found out that I'm not artistic.

    Answer by attap5 at 9:16 PM on Jun. 17, 2011

  • Stay open and curious; explore why they are asking or what prompted the question. You might launch this whole earnest discussion about reproduction when it turns out the kid simply was filling out a form & had to indicate sex (Male or Female) and that was the source of the "what's sex?" question!
    Not that you need to avoid anything, but just stay present in the moment & connected to the kid, not just to what you think is happening. lol
    In my own experience, these things have been periodic discussions over time that weren't specifically "about sex" so much as about bodies, about reproduction, seeds (sperm) & eggs, menstruation.... This is a natural outgrowth of living together. "How does the daddy's sperm GET to the egg to fertilize it?" didn't occur to her for a long time.
    The openness and frankness that you cultivate, the tone you set, all helps build a foundation that will benefit future conversations.

    Answer by girlwithC at 1:30 AM on Jun. 18, 2011

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