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What to do, what to do?......

Ok, long story short, my "loving husband" and I lost our house some time ago and when we were getting ready to move out he told me that he didn't want me and our DD living with him. He claimed that he just needed some time "to find himself" or something like that, but I suspect that what he was trying to find was more time with the girlfriend that I found out about not long after he left. Because of him refusing to let us live with him I had to move in with my brother who ended up moving back our home state (a 4 hour drive from where we were all living) so I no longer had a place to stay in that state, and because my job didn't pay well I started looking for a second job but my boss thought I was looking for a different job and so I was replaced. Fast forward, I ended up moving back in with my parents in another state. Since the move my husband has been refusing any and all contact with me or our DD and I'm almost positive it's because of his girlfriend. He refuses to divorce me because he doesn't want to pay child support, so I have to wait a few more months before I can file on my own. Now here's the big question, recently a really great guy (who knows my situation) has started to show interest in me, and I'm wondering if I should even think about persuing anything with him in the future. I'm not talking about jumping into a relationship right away, but I think it would be nice to go out every now and again, even if it's just a friendship thing. This guy isn't trying to rush things and I don't think that this would be a "dating" thing. But I do wonder if it would be a good idea to go on a casual date from time to time. What do you think ladies? Wait around for the hubby to get bored with his GF or pull away completely and go out on a date?

Answer Question
 
heratyc

Asked by heratyc at 9:58 PM on Jun. 17, 2011 in Relationships

Level 13 (962 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • I would wait it out and wait until you are in a better spot to start thinking about a new relationship.
    Melbornj

    Answer by Melbornj at 9:59 PM on Jun. 17, 2011

  • I'm actually not thinking about a relationship, just a date, just to spend some time out with a nice guy. I'm not really in a position to start a new relationship, trust me, lol.
    heratyc

    Comment by heratyc (original poster) at 10:07 PM on Jun. 17, 2011

  • Then why go out. You can get what you are talking about from a woman or a group.
    tootoobusy

    Answer by tootoobusy at 10:16 PM on Jun. 17, 2011

  • I have been where you are. I was unemployed. I could not afford to pay for a divorce. I went to Legal Aid. They paid for my divorce. I do not know if they stil do that anymore. It was years ago. I have had men to say that they only wanted to be my friend. But, once the guy took me out it was a different story. He no longer wanted to be my friend. He wanted more than friendship. I thought that he was so understanding because we had conversed over the telephone on several occasions. I have learned that men say what they think you want to hear.
    Patricia587

    Answer by Patricia587 at 11:15 PM on Jun. 17, 2011

  • Even though you are still legally married, but living separately, you should still be able to get child support from him for your daughter. That has nothing to do with it. It would be for your daughter and not for you. I don't think him saying that he is still married should affect whether or not he pays it.
    amessageofhope

    Answer by amessageofhope at 12:16 AM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • go out! enjoy your time! would you be questioning it if it was a female friend? why question since he's just a guy? and try to get that divorce soon! you are so much better than that
    Shy_Dia

    Answer by Shy_Dia at 1:37 AM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • agree with melborn
    smiley745

    Answer by smiley745 at 5:09 AM on Jun. 18, 2011

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