Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

Was I right?

My 12 yo dd did not want to stay in the store that her friends went to so she took off and went to another store. She knows that it is our rule that she must stay with at least one friend for safety reasons. She was banned from the mall for quite awhile and then was allowed to go again with her friends. All was fine till the other day I happened to take her and a friend to the mall and it just so happened that I came upon them and at that exact same time saw the two split going their seperate ways. I busted her and she said her friend was going to the bathroom and she stayed in the store. I explained to her she should have gone with her. We were kinda responsible for her friend as SHE WAS WITH US. I took the privilege of malls with her friends again. Weird that I happened to see the whole thing. Guess I was meant to to prove she hasn't learned her lesson yet!! What would you do as punishment?

Answer Question
 
cat4458

Asked by cat4458 at 10:26 AM on Jun. 18, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Level 14 (1,669 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • Sounds like you've already banned her from the Mall. That sounds like punishment to me.
    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 10:27 AM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • Just tell her if she can't respect you, sticking together with friends at the mall , then she can only go to the mall. with you. So you can show her what sticking together means.
    incarnita

    Answer by incarnita at 10:39 AM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • She doesn't get to go for awhile again...personally I think 12 is a bit young for going without an adult around anyway-but that's me...
    charlotsomtimes

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 10:54 AM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • I wouldn't allow her to go to the mall with anyone but you for the rest of the summer. She could bring a friend, but they must stay with you the entire time. If you don't have the time or you don't feel like it, you won't be looking at the things they like. If you don't get hard on her now, it is only going to get worse. These young kids have no idea the dangers that are out there. Most of the time it isn't the children, but the predators, who can lurk anywhere in even the nicest of places. You are doing what you can to keep her safe. Don't let other mothers tell you that she should have freedom. How would you feel if she was abducted (and YES it can happen to you, it happens to someone, those same someones that though the same thing)? Or worse yet, found dead somewhere. You would never be able to live with yourself. Protecting your children is your job, to heck with giving them freedom.
    attap5

    Answer by attap5 at 10:54 AM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • if she can't follow the rules, then she can't do it anymore. she will have to live with shopping with mom and dad again....boo hoo lol
    princessbeth79

    Answer by princessbeth79 at 11:20 AM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • maybe she honestly thought it was okay as long as she stayed in the same store so they could find each other. I would've just explained to her that they need to stay together even to go to the bathroom and give her one more chance. Sometimes teens don't think "Oh we should even go to the bathroom together in case something happens." They're thinking "It's just the bathroom. What could happen?"
    MamaStuart

    Answer by MamaStuart at 3:09 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.