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How to get MIL to stop badmouthing you to your child?

I have a 4 month old daughter and my in laws don't like me particularly my MIL. I'm afraid that as she gets older, my MIL will badmouth me to her. I'm also afraid that she will get into one of the many prescriptions/marijuana that are constantly left out and be seriously hurt. I don't want to cut them out of her life but I constantly worry about this. Does anyone have any advice?

Answer Question
 
cinpin

Asked by cinpin at 2:05 PM on Jun. 18, 2011 in Relationships

Level 1 (3 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • Don't leave her unattended! She's your daughter, if she wants to spend time with her, i'd be right there to make sure none of the above happens!

    anichols1

    Answer by anichols1 at 2:09 PM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • she hasn't even started. honestly, don't worry about things that might not even happen. you can cross that bridge when and if you come to it.
    tnm786

    Answer by tnm786 at 2:14 PM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • My mother smoke Marijuana and has a license for it. I tell her I don't want my child around the drugs she uses. She says they aren't drugs, shes just heavily medicated, and she doesn't use "street drugs". I have no problem with people doing drugs, as long as they don't do it around me or my child. This is coming from an ex pot head. I use to have my license to, but I don't want my child around it. My priorities have changed, and I have cut out so many people from my life since I became pregnant. Even my best friend of 8 years, who just didn't understand why I didn't want her to be high around me while I was pregnant. I'v cut my mother out, not just for the drugs, but shes also mentally ill, which is made worse by the pot smoking. If you don't want your child around it, don't expect people to change...drop them.
    monstersmommy20

    Answer by monstersmommy20 at 2:20 PM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • Personally I wouldn't put my daughter in that situation. I'd say if she wants to see your daughter she needs to come to you so you are there to supervise and if she does anything you do not approve of then she needs to leave. I wouldn't say much about the whole her badmouthing you to your daughter until a problem arises, then I'd make it clear to her YOU are the mother and she needs to either respect that or keep her distance until she can respect you. But I wouldnt leave her alone with someone who is known to do drugs.
    husky_grlie08

    Answer by husky_grlie08 at 2:26 PM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • Ummm, don't let the woman be with your daughter.
    bcauseimthemom

    Answer by bcauseimthemom at 2:40 PM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • Best bet would be to have hub talk to her. Tell her the ground rules...1. No smoking around your daughter, and 2. If she tries to badmouth you, then she'll never get to see the kid again. This is what my husband had to do with his mother (well, she doesn't smoke pot, but she did trash talk me to him).
    hopeandglory53

    Answer by hopeandglory53 at 3:03 PM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • I wouldn't allow my DD to go over there- make her come to you to visit. Medications left out are a BIG no-no, and really dangerous.
    lovingmy4babies

    Answer by lovingmy4babies at 4:22 PM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • Don't let her go over to their house unattended and get your husband to lay down the law as far as how they are to behave around your child.
    sweetpotato418

    Answer by sweetpotato418 at 4:37 PM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • Thank you all for your advice.
    cinpin

    Comment by cinpin (original poster) at 8:03 AM on Jun. 19, 2011

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