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11 Bumps

Why do mothers choose to co-sleep and end up on Supernanny at wits end because they want their child to sleep in their own bed suddenly?

I see this all the time. Proud mommy's who "co-sleep".
When their child is about 3,4,5,6, etc....the moms and dads are exhausted and decide they want to sleep in their bed like normal couples do(without children scrunched in between, on top, feet in your face etc).
I see it time and time again on Nanny 911 and SuperNanny also.
Mothers and fathers ready to pull their hair out because they cannot get their screaming, squalling child to sleep in their own bed in their own room.
So, what's with this?

Do the parents really think that training your child, for a couple years to sleep with you, is just going to suddenly go away when the parents want it to and are tired of being kicked and pee'd on and not having any privacy with their mate? Really?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:04 PM on Jun. 18, 2011 in Parenting Debate

This question is closed.
Answers (38)
  • I LOVE cosleeping. With that said, at 2 years old I started to slowly transition my son to his own bed. I didn't expect it to be a magical transformation. I expected bumps and tears. I plan to start transitioning my second son to sleep in his own bed starting at 13 months. Once again I expect it to be a process that I will love and guide them through. I went into cosleeping knowing full well what I was getting myself into. Sadly, you're right, most people amaze me with how they think that they can just force the kid out of their bed and everything will be okay.
    hill_star03

    Answer by hill_star03 at 4:40 PM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • i love co-sleeping it was great! and once my dd is ready to leave the bed she can! she starts off in her crib and gets in our bed during the night about 75% of the time! some night she loves her bed and others she just needs her mommy! she is 16months so around 2 we will work on her staying in her bed more often! but for now she is fine! i do agree at 4 and 5 kids need to b in their bed!
    Caroline2010

    Answer by Caroline2010 at 4:08 PM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • It makes you think this is a very common problem after seeing it on 6 out of 9 shows, for example."

    Ummm...the reason they're ON the show is because they're having problems. Of course it's common for everyone on the show to experience difficulty. They're usually the most extreme cases or they wouldn't be on there. Why would they show the families who are having no behavioral problems? Your reasoning makes no sense.
    LovingSAHMommy

    Answer by LovingSAHMommy at 5:34 PM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • I bed-shared for 5 years. It was an easy transition for her to go to sleep in her own bed. Sometime during the night she used to crawl back into my bed. I didn't care.


    Now she sleeps all through the night without any problems. We didn't have the screaming, crying problems that you see on Super Nanny. (Which, is probably some what staged and an over-exaggeration of most parenting)


    I didn't care that she slept with me most of the time, and during the winter is was perfect because I keep the heat turned off at night otherwise we'd suffocate. (Small apartment, heater is supposed to be for a bigger house). So we'd co-sleep, she'd stay warm and I wouldn't have the heat on.

    lizzeh

    Answer by lizzeh at 4:17 PM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • I co slept with DS, not really by choice though. he HATED his crib. At 12 months we got him a bed, and I transitioned. He sleeps so good in that bed. I did not want to end up like my in laws. Their DD refused to sleep in her own room until she was like 9 years old. Plus, I am not really into co sleeping as some are. I NEED SPACE when I sleep.

    KairisMama

    Answer by KairisMama at 4:18 PM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • I co-slept too, but I think my DH & I were pretty patient with our son when it was time for him to sleep on his own. There were nights we were frustrated, but we knew we had no one to blame but ourselves. We made the choice for our family, & it wasn't my son's fault it was a tough transition to sleeping along.

    I remember when I told my pediatrician we were co-sleeping. He told me, "I have no problem w/ that, as long as you're doing it safely. But just remember - everyone pays the piper. You pay now, or you pay later, but everyone pays." So true & something all co-sleeping parents should keep in mind!
    sweetpotato418

    Answer by sweetpotato418 at 4:25 PM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • I co-slept with my daughter for the first 9 months or so... I loved it. I wish I had done it with my son as well. The problem with the parents on those shows isn't co-sleeping it's the fact they are unable to assert authority over their children. when we were ready for DD to sleep in her own bed we transitioned her not problem.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 4:29 PM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • I don't think there is anything wrong with co-sleeping. What each family chooses is their own business and does not require a anyone to judge them, least of all a nameless, faceless internet shrew.
    scout_mom

    Answer by scout_mom at 5:09 PM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • It's not co-sleeping that gets those people onto shows like that. It's lack of discipline and routine across the board that do. You can't pick one tiny portion of how someone parents and blame the whole on that one thing.

    I coslept with my oldest - no issues getting him out of our bed when I was ready.
    Ginger0104

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 6:07 PM on Jun. 18, 2011

  • Some of you people just cannot answer a general question without getting OFFENDED.
    Did anyone call you BY NAME? No.
    It's a proven fact...there are other moms on here all the time with problems getting their children to sleep by themselves so don't act like the problem DOES NOT EXIST because it does....for those of you who are taking this so personal. No one said you did anything bad, did they??. "

    If you don't like the response, then maybe you should be more aware of how you phrase the question. You said, "why do mothers..", not "why do SOME mothers". If you make it sound like a generalization, be prepared for people to get defensive. Otherwise, don't ask the question.
    LovingSAHMommy

    Answer by LovingSAHMommy at 9:18 PM on Jun. 18, 2011

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