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Should an absent parent be able to talk to children on the phone??

Should an absent parent who doesn't pay child support or do anything to support the child be allowed to communicate with children when they aren't living up to the custody agreement they signed and agreed upon???

 
o0luvlissa0o

Asked by o0luvlissa0o at 12:21 AM on Jun. 19, 2011 in Parenting Debate

Level 5 (95 Credits)
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Answers (14)
  • Most definitely. The money and agreements should be left between you and your ex and the child should not be kept from his/her other parent because they are not living up to the agreement made with you.
    AllAboutKeeley

    Answer by AllAboutKeeley at 12:30 AM on Jun. 19, 2011

  • ~*Yes*~... you chose to have a child with them, the child didn't ask to be born... and the reality is, if you keep the child from them instead of allowing them to see that person for who/what they are... later in life you will end up the bad guy when they rebel against the parent that kept them from the other!

    "Sorry kid, your mom kept you from me"...
    MommaClark3

    Answer by MommaClark3 at 12:26 AM on Jun. 19, 2011

  • Same situation with my oldest daughter. Her dad lives out of state since she was five (shes 11 now) he pays nothing and never has. I still let her see him when we are in town and they talk and text almost every day. I know she loves him and even tho he is being selfish by not paying, I feel like Id be being selfish if I were to prevent her from seeing/talking to him. I guess I'm this way because it was the same with my dad when I was little and my mom always talked bad about him and never wanted us to see him, but in my eyes, he was my dad and no matter what bad my mom had to say, I still loved him. It wasn't until I got older that I realized exactly what my mom was talking about and how much of a piece of shit he really was, so on my own I made the decision to stop talking to him.
    BitsMom00

    Answer by BitsMom00 at 1:33 AM on Jun. 19, 2011

  • Yes. Your response makes it sounds like you have your children for sale. Or rent. No cash, no contact. You don't see something a little wrong with that? The money is between you and him. Nothing is between his kids and him. Holding them for ransom makes you the bad guy. Take the money up with the court.
    Trinity001

    Answer by Trinity001 at 6:48 AM on Jun. 19, 2011

  • i think its more about whats best for the kid like. my twins """father"""" has never been involved. if he up and wanted to talk to them on the phone, I would really have to struggle to do whats best for them and not just ban him from them, just because I don't like him. if it isn't going to confuse, upset, or cause any trouble for them, if it would be GOOD for them to speak to that person on the phone, then they should be allowed to because its not about what that parent does or doesn't do its whats best for the child.however if it just upsets the child, confuses them, or gets their hopes up for a relationship that wont' ever be there, then no, they shouldn't be.
    ElsaSalsaaa

    Answer by ElsaSalsaaa at 12:28 AM on Jun. 19, 2011

  • So what you are saying it perfectly okay for another parent who also chose to lay down with you and make a child to do nothing to help you support them even when they went to court and said they would legally! It okay for me to pay for every thing cuddle them when there sick, feed them, diaper them, cloth them, and pay for their activities solely out of my pocket him do nothing but still get to talk to them and act like he is a good parent? I mean don't get me wrong yes he probably loves them but isn't being a parent more then loving your child? I am not trying to keep the children from him but in my opinion if you want to be an active parent in their live you need to be active in sharing the cost of bringing them into this world. Its a privilege to be a parent not a right!
    o0luvlissa0o

    Comment by o0luvlissa0o (original poster) at 12:33 AM on Jun. 19, 2011

  • Actually if you look up child support laws it say the child support is for the children not the parent so if it isn't being provided for the children why should I let him communicate with them???
    o0luvlissa0o

    Comment by o0luvlissa0o (original poster) at 12:35 AM on Jun. 19, 2011

  • If the child wants to speak to their absent parent they should be allowed to. It isn't about mom and dad it is supposed to be about the kids.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:10 AM on Jun. 19, 2011

  • i say yes but it depends on the age of the child. truthfully if you say so and so is on the phone and the kid is 2 they wont really understand who that is. but if they are like 12 sure. if its a legal document. take him back to court. he should be in jail if he is not paying.
    lambdarose

    Answer by lambdarose at 1:34 AM on Jun. 19, 2011

  • By law, yes. In my own personal opinion, no.
    emmyandlisa

    Answer by emmyandlisa at 1:59 AM on Jun. 19, 2011

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