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How can I get my dd of 12 yrs. motivated to do her chores?

It's not like she has much to do. All I ask her to do is maintain her room and bed made. I also ask her to clean her bathroom once a week since she is the only one using it and she'll only wipe counters but not do toilet, tub nor floor. I've even left her toilet unclean until it leaves a ring (gross) just to see if she'll get grossed out and want to clean it but no that didn't work either.

She is just not motivated to maintain her things and I am so tired of having to keep reminding her to pick up, clean this, do that, over and over again. Funny thing is she's a straight A honor student, is very responsible when it comes to getting up on time to get ready to go to school, lunch, backpack, homework, etc. I NEVER have to remind her of anything when it comes to school. Her teachers love her!! I'm so proud of her in that sence and I do tell her but when it comes to helping me here at home with her things she's totally different. Any ideas!!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 5:30 PM on Jun. 20, 2011 in Tweens (9-12)

Answers (7)
  • Mine get an allowance. If they do what I ask they get all of it. It they dont I deduct money.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 5:31 PM on Jun. 20, 2011

  • She's 12...it will get better as they get older...at least in my house it has

    it's a situation where no friends can come over unless the room is clan and no sleepovers unless the bathroom is clean maybe?
    You may have to let her know you will be inspecting the bathroom-and that means toilet, floor, tub...and if it's not done well she will be doing it again. Also show her how- remind her that it's all those things not just the sink
    charlotsomtimes

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 5:45 PM on Jun. 20, 2011

  • clan=clean
    charlotsomtimes

    Answer by charlotsomtimes at 5:45 PM on Jun. 20, 2011

  • Maybe she can earn points for doing chores and turn those points in for a reward?
    tspillane

    Answer by tspillane at 7:26 PM on Jun. 20, 2011

  • My oldest is turning 11 but the same rule applies to all my kids. You either do your chores or you sit on your bed until you want to do them. There's no TV, radio or games in their room. The younger girls still play with Barbies so they can possibly find something to do but there's nothing for the oldest to do (she's not into Barbies any more). Sadly she'd rather sit on her bed and cry and pout than do her chores but that's the rule. They don't get to do anything fun unless they do their chores.
    justanotherjen

    Answer by justanotherjen at 12:01 AM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • I am having the same problem with my 12 yo dd and dishes. I talked to my mom and she said all of her kids ( there are 8 of us) she said we all grew out of it. I think patience and persistence as well as a little discipline. Good luck ladies, it gets better, or so I am told.

    mama04inID

    Answer by mama04inID at 2:45 AM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • You have received good ideas here. Positive reinforcement is the best. The toilet and bathroom seem to be a real situation. Are your expectations for the room higher than they need to be? Just a thought.
    tootoobusy

    Answer by tootoobusy at 8:00 AM on Jun. 21, 2011

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