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3 Bumps

What would you do or what is your thought would be on this

my Husband and i are not showing any affection anywhere even at home, not having sweet talks on the phone like i would preffer to call him honey or love i miss you or so. We don't even call each other when he is at work unless its important or ergent. When we met we were not getting anough of each other allways telling each other how much we love and calling quite alot durring the day.
but everything changed. His passion and love for me comes when he hase sex urges. I am used to it by now as 4 years past of this kind of relationship but is it normal?

Answer Question
 
remedy373

Asked by remedy373 at 1:50 AM on Jun. 21, 2011 in Relationships

Level 5 (93 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • I don't know if it's normal or not. But before I lived with mine, we texted and called each other all day. Now that we live together, we don't. We talk on the phone when he is at work if it's important, something that can't wait. We text once a day usually just to say I love you. Otherwise, we sleep in the same bed, we don't need to talk constantly anymore. I think things just settle down some once you live together.
    marybeth927

    Answer by marybeth927 at 1:56 AM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • Don't accept this now. Straighten it out before it is your life for the next 50 years.
    tootoobusy

    Answer by tootoobusy at 1:56 AM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • You saing that i should not continue go on like we are two borring misreble people for ever but do something about it tootoobusy
    remedy373

    Comment by remedy373 (original poster) at 1:59 AM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • Things do tend to simmer down with all the responsibility but you can fire it back-up again,make the first move-see how it goes.
    Sarah961

    Answer by Sarah961 at 2:10 AM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • I honestly did try that sarah but it allways seams like i am the only one who does it all, i still have full heart of love holding on for him but i don't whant to use it only for sex or else i feel used, and he is naturaly holds on love only so he could use it for that steamy night in bed with me.
    remedy373

    Comment by remedy373 (original poster) at 2:17 AM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • I've been married over 20 years, and things do settle down and become routine from time to time. You want to get some sparkle back into your relationship, all you have to do is be more romantic. You say you're too busy, and I understand that, but even a busy mom can bring him a cup of coffee in bed in the morning, or give him a quick hug when he walks past you, just for no particular reason. Look into his eyes when you talk to him. Little things, ya know?
    judimary

    Answer by judimary at 2:18 AM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • I think that if this situation is bothering you, then you should do something about it. Don't talk to him straight up and tell him what to do or say men freak out; especially if he finds out out of the blue that he has been screwing things up for you. men are weird. I have learned that we (women) must very secretly control the situation. you can start by doing things he likes like watching soccer, in my case that was what I had to do, or something like that or dress up nicely and ask him to go out, don't give him room to say no and have fun with ur hubby. Maybe the two of you feeling comfortable and enjoying each other's company will bring back some romanticism, it worked for me. Sometimes the everyday routine is a love killer.
    paufonseca

    Answer by paufonseca at 2:24 AM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • After 11 years of marriage things aren't like they were in the newlywed stage but we still say I love you everyday and I call him honey or sweetie and he has endearing names for me also, it seems like things have cooled down too much for the two of you. I think you should talk to him about it, not in an acusing way but say I noticed things weren't like they used to be have you noticed this too, it will open things up cause he may not even realize he is being so cold

    DianeMary

    Answer by DianeMary at 2:45 AM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • I send him random texts during the day that say love you, miss you. he sends them back or I leave a love you note in his car. Maybe just get the ball rolling again and turn on the lovey a bit, see if it sparks him back into it.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:34 AM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • Pick up the phone and call him then
    rinamomof2

    Answer by rinamomof2 at 7:31 AM on Jun. 21, 2011

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