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3 Bumps

Divorce???

I have always wondered what happens after you give everything for someone and that person does not appreciate it, do you keep waiting to see if this person will ever change or you just move on???

Answer Question
 
paufonseca

Asked by paufonseca at 4:01 AM on Jun. 21, 2011 in Relationships

Level 12 (781 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • It took me years to realize i couldnt change a man that didnt want to change,i finally moved on from a bad situation.
    Some things you can live with ,some you can"t.
    Sarah961

    Answer by Sarah961 at 4:08 AM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • I agree with Sarah. You can never change a man! I know that from being married 20 years. You either have to accept the situation and try to change your attitude towards things (which is what I've done) or move on.
    Ashoonik

    Answer by Ashoonik at 4:14 AM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • I put my all into a marriage for 8 years and it wasn't enough for him... We are in the process of moving on via divorce
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:46 AM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • Try to communicate and let him know you don't feel like things are going well
    rinamomof2

    Answer by rinamomof2 at 7:27 AM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • You can't change someone. I wouldn't wait around for it, either.
    lovingmy4babies

    Answer by lovingmy4babies at 9:25 AM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • You can never change a man no matter how hard you try. If you do then they will resent you for it. If you cant accept him for who his is then move on.
    Eisleysmommy27

    Answer by Eisleysmommy27 at 10:11 AM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • After 11 years....I moved on after I trying everything I could possibly think of. Eventually,, I just had to face the fact that I didn't make such a good choice in husband material and take my losses and move on. Best thing I ever did. Everyone's lives became a lighter load in one way, not gonna say it was easy on the kids but...kids bounce back and once they got the hang of having divorced parents...they said they didn't miss all the turmoil afterall. That's just our family though, may not be everyone's.
    KellyGirl_TX

    Answer by KellyGirl_TX at 12:15 PM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • i agree with the other posts. you will never change a man unless he absolutely wants to and that's a big absolutely. its up to you if you want to just hang in there and wait it out or leave. you have to do what's best for you and if that means leaving then that's what you have to do. but men can never change/
    lucky35

    Answer by lucky35 at 2:27 PM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • I have lived this. He even admitted when we were on the road to repair that he "just wanted to be single" at that time. Which pissed me off because he never told me, and my life would have been easier without all is crap (but we probably wouldn't still be married). But I stuck it out, and I was devastated to hear that. And he now regrets saying that and is apologetic about his behaviors. (No cheating). We have worked it out and will be celebrating our 20th anniversary in December. Although I did have to put pride aside, things are wonderful now. Looking back, I wish I hadn't put my everything into him, I never imagined he would ever not be as "in it" as I was, it shook me and robbed me of total security. Even now. I can't tell you what to do, but regardless, pursue your interests, continue your education if you want, just make sure you do what you want and what makes YOU happy.
    Austinsmom35

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 9:26 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

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