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Should i feel like a crappy friend ?

I have a friend and we use to be best friends for almost 10 years...

But lately we have really drifted apart, to where we only talk maybe once every week or so.. and the last time i seen her was over a month is mainly becuase I have a job during the day now, and by the time its over, it is time to make dinner and spend time with my husband and kids... and on the few times when i have been able to go see her, she has had other plans....

Well lately she has been putting how sick she is on facebook, and I have told her to go to the doctors and such and she will say no... she even told me one day that she can hardly breathe and I said you really need to go because it was so serious... well the next day she called to see if I could watch her kids while she rested... but i said I really couldnt because me and my kids were really sick also ( we had went to the doctors the night before and he said we were very contagious) , in fact when she called I had just got done puking... so obviously I didnt feel up to watching the kids, nor did I want to get them sick...but i tried to help her think of someone who could watch them, and tried to again convince her to go to the docotors...but she said no and got off of the phone... I then got ahold of my dad, who is a paramedic, to see if he would go down to check her out ( listen to her breathing and see if it was something serious) ... he said he would so I called her back , but she refused and said that she didnt want him to come down...

later that night i got on facebook and seen where she posted from her phone that she was in the ER .. and i asked if she found out what was wrong or anything ( in a comment) .. and she wrote back " why do you ask like you care, you couldnt watch the boys earlier when i was sick, why does it matter now" ... i was completely shocked that she would say that.... I mean was I really that awful to not watch the kids ? I had offered to watch them days before when i wasnt sick so she could go to the doctors and she refused then...

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 9:51 PM on Jun. 21, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • naw sounds like ur trying to be a great friend u have to put u and ur kids first, she shouldnt have wanted her kids to come over and get sick. sounds like she is just bitter at u or mabey jealous?

    Answer by Creasman at 10:00 PM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • No, she is in the wrong...not u!

    Answer by MommyH2 at 10:00 PM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • I would cut her out of my life. She sounds too selfish and like a drama whore. You don't need that in your life. You have made every effort to try and help her and she decided to not take advantage of it....

    Answer by bcauseimthemom at 10:00 PM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • You didn't do anything wrong. She should have gone in to see the doctor when you offered to watch her children for you. She's being cranky towards you, it's not your fault she didn't take your advice. Ignore her, she shouldn't be taking her frustrations out on you.

    Answer by danichaos at 10:03 PM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • First of all I wouldn't want you to watch my kids.... being sick! Why would anyone bring in colds and such willingly into their house. Although you may not win the best friend of the year award at least you are not a give me and get type of If she was so bad she would not have refused care or help when offered... sounds like you have just grown your separate ways and she is sick in the head. Think about moving on and enjoy your own family after all if she is willing to risk her own kids health how do you think she'd treat your kids... you don't need people like that around your family.

    Answer by Mommy_Aiken at 11:53 PM on Jun. 21, 2011

  • She is being selfish and having a bit of a pity party. There are times in life when long term friends aren't good for you anymore. She seems a bit hurt. I would call her and have a heart to heart if she is important to you. It may just be that you are in different places right now and parting ways may be best.

    I certainly hope you can put this behind you. You sound like a genuine person who this friend wants to take advantage of.

    Answer by love2snorkel70 at 12:33 AM on Jun. 22, 2011

  • Sounds like she is one who likes to 'wallow in her own misery' and get everyone to feel sorry for her and give her attention. I think you are a good friend, offering to take the kids, and urging her to seek medical treatment. It was very nice of you to call your dad and ask if he could check her out - so that right there proves you WERE worried about her, and tried to help. I think it was inconsiderate of her to expect you to take her kids (when you and yours were sick) and then get mad cause you did not want to give her kids your sick germs. So if she ended up in the ER it is her own fault, for not going in sooner to be checked out . Also it was very rude of her to make such a comment to you on fb. If it were me, I would give serious thought about ending the friendship--- as it sounds like she is not a very good friend.

    Answer by MizLee at 1:59 AM on Jun. 22, 2011

  • She is an attention seeker. It sounds like you did what you could to help her, and she refused.

    Answer by MeandMyBabes at 1:22 PM on Jun. 22, 2011

  • I agree with everyone else, shes the one that sounds like the crappy "friend"

    Answer by MRMama at 1:58 PM on Jun. 22, 2011

  • You were sick! What could you do? You could barely watch your own children! She sounds a bit like she enjoys drama (posting how sick she is to get sympathy and attention). I would just leave her alone, you've done all you can do.

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 12:43 AM on Jun. 23, 2011

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