My DH and I have been together for almost six yrs now. Our sons 10 months old.
Ever since our LO came around its just been one fight after another. (Before, we NEVER fought.) I love him so much, I'm trying so hard to think from his point of view but I just don't get it. He has friends over at least 3 times a wk, usually until the early mornings. Him & his friends are huge on xbox games, and he's always drinking. Sometimes even on his lunch breaks hell drink a beer. Just one, so he's not getting dunk but still. It's been a week since we've had any alcohol in the house, I used to drink every night but we have a baby now, we can't be intoxicated all the time...
He says he wants me to be more adventerous sexually so I look up positions to try, I try to dominate him, to let him dominate me. I suggested a threesome, which he declined. I've watch porn to spice things up & to learn from it. After the pregnancy though, I've been so uncomfortable with myself I'm just not fully comfortable being naked. I try to be, and I try to pretend I am, but its just not working.
He goes out one to three nights a week to go to clubs & bars with his friends... I work full time and I get NO help around the house. Half the time I ask for help, he either says no, or gets angry while he does it. I tell him all the time how I miss him, I miss going out with him, and just spending time together. I've asked to get a babysitter so we could go play pool. (That used to be our thing, Wed go three times a week) hell say no bc were broke but that same wkend hell go to a bar. He says his friends buy him drinks but I know his friends and that theyre too broke to buy him that many drinks that many times.
I work full time but i have to get permission to go out bc of money and half the time its a no. There's even a school for hair stylistic around me so I can get cuts for free so all I need is $ to tip but he says were too broke so I can't even get haircuts.
He decided to quit cigarettes and wants me to, too. I agreed just bc I want to help him. But honestly quitting isn't something i had in mind at all and I'm a bit resentful for being made to feel I have to for him. I bought cigs the day after he told me, i honestly forgot, and he's so mad I'm making it hard for him. I apologized & told him I don't really want to quit so its going to be a bit more difficult for me. Plus I've smoked for 3 more years than he has...
I'm so frustrated but I keep trying. I've given up a lot to be with him, and I love him so much but I'm so tired of arguing & being angry. I keep trying to talk to him but he's not reciprocating. the last time I tried to explain why I'd been upset he told me "u dnt have to explain whats wrong, just stop being a bitch."
Asked by Anonymous at 3:19 AM on Jun. 22, 2011 in Relationships
I would suggest counseling but he would say no its too expensive unless your insurance covers behavioral health. There are deep issues and until he can grow up and be a dad and admit he isn't being a responsible husband and father I don't know what can be done
Answer by DianeMary at 3:26 AM on Jun. 22, 2011
Answer by Creasman at 3:27 AM on Jun. 22, 2011
Answer by bcauseimthemom at 3:31 AM on Jun. 22, 2011
Answer by Anonymous at 3:34 AM on Jun. 22, 2011
Answer by Ashoonik at 3:39 AM on Jun. 22, 2011
Answer by RobinChristine at 3:45 AM on Jun. 22, 2011
Answer by Maro236 at 4:02 AM on Jun. 22, 2011