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5 Bumps

Husbands? adult content

how do you know if your husband is still in love with you? Because every time we go to his friends house him and his friends wife also end up by their selves together and it makes me upset. I feel as like they only wanted him up there and not me is that normal...She is always texting him and whenever she calls him, he is no where to be found...I ask him why he cant talk to her around me and he said it was because he cant talk in front of people but it hasn't stopped him before. He said the reason she likes to talk to him is because she doesn't have nobody else to talk to but I am here...For example we went swimming with them and he wouldn't play with our daughter but he could play with her kids...Whats up with that? Should I be worried? I am confused and feel like he doesn't love and that he uses me for sex...I need advice on what I should do....

 
shelle21

Asked by shelle21 at 10:52 AM on Jun. 23, 2011 in Relationships

Level 16 (2,522 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • I really like NannyB's advice. It have done that before. Hopefully, he is intuitive enough to pick up what you are doing and not take advantage of you actions.

    I left a message on another post of a woman having similar issues. I want to tell them to you as well because this particular model helped me once and maybe it can help you.

    There is a picture model of the total marriage that consist of a pie chart with 3 equal pieces: Physical Intimacy, Emotional Intimacy, and Friendship/Companionship

    Many people only consider Physical Intimacy the only way you can cheat on your partner, but really there are 3 ways if it gets in the way of your marriage. You can sit your hubby down and draw him this chart. Let him know that what he does when he behaves the way he does, it gets in the way of your perfect marriage.

    Sometimes, you have to pull the oh so popular "taste of his own medicine" card!!!
    Gingerwheel

    Answer by Gingerwheel at 11:33 AM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • Yup. Something is wrong there. Why cant she talk to her husband?? And, if he's putting another woman before you, or your kids, he's cheating. Even if its not physical, its still cheating.
    mlmkjw

    Answer by mlmkjw at 10:56 AM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • umm YES BE WORRIED!! that is NOT acceptable, I would confront them, even if it is innocent doesnt make it right!
    SabrenaLeigh

    Answer by SabrenaLeigh at 10:54 AM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • I would definitely be worried... yall need to have a serious talk. Sorry mama :( Good luck.
    kamrynlily07

    Answer by kamrynlily07 at 11:04 AM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • You need to put a stop to that. That is definitely abnormal behavior with "friends'. She can talk to her husband or someone else but she wouldn't be talking to mine in private conversations. Some things are just 'off limits" in married life and to me, this is one of those things.
    KellyGirl_TX

    Answer by KellyGirl_TX at 11:04 AM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • Yup. Something is wrong there. Why cant she talk to her husband?? And, if he's putting another woman before you, or your kids, he's cheating. Even if its not physical, its still cheating.

    I agree. You can have an "emotional affair". To me, it's just as wrong. His heart is obviously somewhere else.
    CollinsMommy729

    Answer by CollinsMommy729 at 11:07 AM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • something is definitely wrong. i would just try to explain to him that the situation makes you uncomfortable and hopefully he'll stop the crap.
    abannist

    Answer by abannist at 11:11 AM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • Are you showing him every day that you are still in love with him? When another woman makes a play for your husband, that's the time to step up the lovin' on your end to ensure that he has no need to give her a second thought. I don't know why the younger generation immediately starts to worry about some flip that's not worth the waste of time. All you need to do is forget about her and turn all your attention to making your husband feel and know that he is the most loved man on earth right in his own home. When you do that, he won't be tempted to give her another glance. And I'm not talking just about sex. I'm talking about telling him what a great husband and father he is, how you have loved him from the day you laid eyes on him. You need to tell him all the things he needs to hear, 'cause you can bet your bippy she's telling him what he needs to hear. And she's playing the damsel in distress card, as well.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 11:16 AM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • I would be worried too.
    booger14

    Answer by booger14 at 11:22 AM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • I'd get all 4 of you together and have a nice chat about her behavior concerning him, and his behavior concerning her. It needs to be brought out in the open for all involved parties. Lay some ground rules as well, like no phone calls or texts from her to him. If she wants to set up a double date or for the families to hang out, she can call you, or her husband can call yours, etc. There can be no more slinking around and hiding if everybody knows what's going on and what to watch for. Good luck!
    lovingmy4babies

    Answer by lovingmy4babies at 11:28 AM on Jun. 23, 2011

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