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Not sure how I feel...

My So broke up with me we had the biggest and only fight we have had in our 6 months together...he found out something about my past that I had not disclosed to him...it was really none of his business and he doesn't want to talk about his past. Anyways I left for the weekend I had to come back a few times for crap i forgot. Wehn I came over Sunday he told me he has been soo depressed with me not here and that he realises how much he really does love me. He thought I was dissposable but he was worng. He said it also helped that when he went to drop his DD off at her moms and he told her about what happened she said oh well you can come stay here for a little while until you can find a cheaper place but that she was happy with the way things were and he realised he didn;t want to be there at all...he says that he knows how much he loves me now that his head is clearer...shouldn;t he have known this before? When he was saying it? He said he can see us getting married and having a baby but he couldn;t picture that before...is that okay? I 'm happy he loves me this much and sees a future,but then I get to thinking..shouldn;t he have felt this way before? I know I should just stop over thinking and be happy right?

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happymama02

Asked by happymama02 at 12:44 PM on Jun. 23, 2011 in Relationships

Level 16 (3,162 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • Sounds like he had a reality check! I'd trust him hunny, he seems sincere. He's admitting that he wants to be with you long term. Just clear the air of anything he may or may not "need" to know this time around so he knows where he stands with you
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:50 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • It can take awhile to process hurtful things.. Im sure he knew deep inside how much he loved you before but whatever new info he learned about you didnt mesh with the way he sees you, men are very insecure even though they try their damnest to pretend theyre not. Sounds to me like he really loves you, just go with it!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:52 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • Some times people just need a wake up call. $$it happens....No ones perfect. Everything is ok. He still loves you and you still love him. If you two do decide to share eachothers past then be sure to keep an open mind and not judge eachother. Also dont let anyone make you feel bad about the love you share. Good luck to you :0)
    mashonad07

    Answer by mashonad07 at 12:53 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • Your thoughts make complete sense. It is weird it took you leaving for him to realize how much he needs and wants you. It just means he wasn't in it for the long haul at first and was probably a fraction emotionally shut off from you. This is how most all men work to protect themselves from being hurt.

    I would go with it and enjoy your new relationship with your beau :)
    Gingerwheel

    Answer by Gingerwheel at 12:54 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • I can see why you'd think that he should have thought that way before. You both need some time to think. I believe that I'd go back with him but not have a baby with him until I was absolutely sure about his and my feelings and intentions. Since you've had one fight, you may have more, and if each time one of you feels like leaving, this is a bad thing. Don't let his saying he wants marriage and a baby sway your common sense- many a slip between cup and lip.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 1:00 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • If the info he learned about you had anything to do with another man then he probably felt threatened and insecure and entertained thoughts like .. I wonder if he had a bigger dick..biceps..nicer pecs..abs..etc..or was better in bed than I was and I wonder if she still thinks about him or wants him back.. I better run away before she hurts me! Men have the emotional maturity of a 5th grader. Cut him some slack and try to understand his feelings since he was so open about them with you.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:07 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • I am going to be the devils advocate here, but I would personally take his comment as a red flag. I don't know that it would prevent me from being with him but it doesn't sound like he even addressed the reason why you had the fight in the first place. It's kinda of like "oh look at this over here, so you ignore that over there." Maybe its subconcious and not on purpose but I would really start to pay closer attention.
    NightOwlMama

    Answer by NightOwlMama at 1:25 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • have fun, be together, but don't subject yourself to this shit repeatedly. you shouldn't have to start leaving every so often to "make" him appreciate you.
    MsSelfDestruct

    Answer by MsSelfDestruct at 1:26 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • Take this VERY slowly. No rushing into anything.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 2:33 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

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