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How to help a loved one cope after a D&C?

My BF was halfway through her second trimester when she had a bad feeling and went to the hospital. There was no heart beat and they performed a D&C while she was under anesthesia. She's devastated and it doesn't help that friends and family are still carrying babies and giving birth around her due date. How can I help her? I keep reminding her she has to stop sleeping so much and walk around because she still has 1 toddler but I'm not sure if that's helping.

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Asked by Anonymous at 3:16 PM on Jun. 23, 2011 in Pregnancy

Answers (5)
  • No she is very very depressed. You need to call her doctor. I know I was the same way. I would hide it very well. Looking back my god I did need help. You are seeing all the signs. I do know there are support groups. You do need to get her help ASAP.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:20 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • This has happened to me twice. I still have trouble with it sometimes and it was 20 years ago. It's still the loss of a baby that you so desperately wanted. Give her time. She will snap out of it. If she doesn't soon, she may need to see a dr for her other childs sake. Give her lots of hugs and let her know you are there for her.

    Answer by zoomomto3 at 3:24 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • Ok.... I will. I feel so bad. She said she doesn't want to live anymore and then changed the subject on me. She keeps sleeping. Also, the DH left her last month and she's living back home with her mom. She told me her mom is not helping her at all with this. Her mom keeps saying "look on the bright side" "you can always have another one later."

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:25 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • She needs to talk to a doctor ASAP!! U can still have PostPartum after this devestating time. She will be in my prayers.

    Answer by msmamakatie at 4:05 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • Thank you!!

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 4:30 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

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