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Worst person in the world..right here.

I know this sounds like's just I have no freaking clue what to do. My mom is of no help..she's been married to many times.

The fact of the matter is: I got close to someone besides my dh..i emotionaly cheated by thinking about him, by allowing dirty thoughts about him. God, i'm a loser..i don't know what i was thinking. I have feelings for the other man. my husband found out and left. I have no idea what to do anymore..marriage is sacred to me..yet i runied it..if he did it to me, i'd leave in a heart beat. Part of me wants to work it out and forget the second guy..but another part of me want to forget my dh, and start a guys for like 6 months..because i'm such a reck..I don't know if my dh will forgive me..I and my dh, have been through hell in the past 5 years. (i'm the way and we have a child)
Go head and be mean to me..i'm an idiot.


Asked by Anonymous at 10:20 PM on Jun. 23, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • Ugg. Quit beating yourself up, damn! You're human and make mistakes. Sounds like your owning up to this one. You didn't ruin squat just by thinking things. Anyone who expects you to never think such things are unreasonable. There has to be give and take. Right now, just work on you being you without anyone, any guy in your life. Learn about you first and what you need. Take care of your child. Don't worry so much about your husband. Pride can heal. Wounds will scab over in time. Just don't do the begging, pleading, crying...please take me back stuff. That will drive any man away fast. But if you would not give him a second chance if it was him instead of you.....what the heck are you calling love in the first place?? Buck up, chin up and don't ask for abuse, even on the Internet. You are worth something. You are somebody's mother. You are woman. You are wife. You have worth. Don't forget that.

    Answer by isabellalecour at 10:44 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • In one sentence you say marriage is sacred to you and the next you say you would leave him if he cheated emotionally.

    An emotional affair is still an affair, but I think it's easier to work through than a sexual affair. If you want your marriage to work, you should seek out marriage counseling.

    Answer by marybeth927 at 10:26 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • Both of you need to take some time to figure out what you want. Give dh some time to clear his head and decide what you both want to do from here.

    Answer by treynlisa at 10:27 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • Wow wish I could give some words of encouragements but yeah you effed up. You seriously need to do so soul searching. Not only do you need to honest to him, but you also need to be honest to yourself. You need to think of what's best for your child. Good luck and I hope it all works out.

    Answer by luvmygrlz at 10:27 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • Your not the first and you wont be the last to do this, your not out there on your own with this, your right it is wrong and I am not condoning your actions but we all are human and we all have issues we fight, this may be one of yours. You really need to look at what lead you to look for something in someone else, whats lacking, if you say you have been through hell the last 5 years- maybe these issues you have been dealing with have lead to you looking outside your marriage, there are always two sides, there are probably things both of you have to change in your relationship if you decide to try to work on things, even though you were the one to get emotionally involved with someone else. I sounds like your marriage is something that could be salvaged but YOU have to want to commit to workingon things 100% if your husband decides he wants to, you can not go back into trying to do things half heartedly CONT:

    Answer by Princess_s21 at 10:30 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • CONT: you sound wishy washy right now, you dont know what you want, thats not going to cut it, you both need to figure out what you want, if you want to save your marriage you need to forsake all others from now on out and concentrate on your marriage, you cant have your cake and eat it too, Good luck!

    Answer by Princess_s21 at 10:32 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • @mary-I know..goodness..(trying not to swear) i'm an idiot. we have been going to marriage counseling..going again soon

    @treynlisa-this is true
    @luv-thank you for the understanding..I didn't want to be like this..i want to make things work..because i only wanted to be married the same time..i feel like i tried and tried. I broke trust..i'm not sure of what i want.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 10:32 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • Sounds like yo have some major growing up to do. I feel sorry that you did you this to your daughter. Get some perspective and act like a responsible adult. You should never have even gone down that road with someone else. You gave that right up when you said I Do. Stop acting like you are single and maybe you wouldn't be getting into messes that not only affect you and your husband, but an innocent child that looks to you to be an example.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:37 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • There is no guarantee the new guy is in it for the long haul. You are taking a huge risk hurting and throwing away a family for someone new. When we get married, we are supposed to be done looking at others as potential mates. Sounds like you got married too young. I just feel bad for your daughter.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:40 PM on Jun. 23, 2011

  • I have a son..yes..i feel bad for him to..that's no way to show a son how to be at all. I know i'm not suppouse to look at others..stupid..stuid me.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 10:46 PM on Jun. 23, 2011