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How do I stop my 4 year old from being so blatantly VIOLENT towards his 2 year old sister?

I dont know how to get him to stop hitting and pushing and scratching her, and he does mean things like putting SOAP in her eyes on purpose! I dont even know how he gets to the stuff! It's driving me nuts and I can't take how mean he is to her anymore! HELP!

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:25 PM on Jun. 24, 2011 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (5)
  • talk to his doctor. is he alone with any1 ever? like a grandparent or other family member&their kids? maybe he's jealous & you could try explaining to him it's bad to do that
    mandielynn23

    Answer by mandielynn23 at 7:41 PM on Jun. 24, 2011

  • He's just about never alone with anyone. he's supposed to be going to the movies alone with his dad this weekend so his sister and I can go do something special, because im a stay at home mom and they're always both with me. Ive tried explaining, Ive tried sending him to his room, we have literally tried EVERYTHING we could think of. And I have talked to the doctor, Ive even had him evaluated for special services, nobody thinks he needs help but me and his dad.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:43 PM on Jun. 24, 2011

  • Have you tried time out? The key is to stay consistent and calm. Give him a warning letting him know it is not okay to hit, etc. his sister. Place him in time out if he does not listen. If he gets up then you place him back into time out. Eventually he will tire out, and he will know you are in charge. It is not so much the time spent in time out, as the control you know have. He needs to know you are serious and will follow through. Before letting him off of time out get down to his level and let him know why he was placed there, end with a hug. A behavior chart is another good idea. Allowing him to place stickers when he does well, and plays nice. After receiving so many stickers reward him with a day at the playground or something he may enjoy. Always praise good behavior. Hopefully in time he will want the positive attention instead of the negative.
    Kellyjude1

    Answer by Kellyjude1 at 8:09 PM on Jun. 24, 2011

  • The only thing I can offer is to NOT spank him, because that will just reinforce that it's ok to hit. Maybe separating them. When he hurts her, he goes to his room and doesn't get to play with her. I wouldn't take him on special trips if he is hurting her. Talk to him about how he would feel if someone was hurting him. Take away toys, etc. Keep bringing it up to the doctor and get him in to see a child psychologist.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 8:11 PM on Jun. 24, 2011

  • he actually didnt go to see his movie this past weekend because he was being naughty. and timeouts dont work for our house, he has emotional issues so those types of punishments dont work. and neither does the acheivement chart, been there tried that thanks though
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 9:52 PM on Jun. 29, 2011

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