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6 Bumps

What to do with my 6 year old

my son is 6 years old. I caught him and his friend in the room playing with each other in a sexual way. I don't want to go about this the wrong way so I really need some help.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:07 PM on Jun. 24, 2011 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Answers (13)
  • I would have to think about that one, but I know what I wouldn't do - I wouldn't get angry or tell him he is bad or anything like that. Kids that age are curious about their bodies. They just need to learn boundaries.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:18 PM on Jun. 24, 2011

  • It is time to reinforce the 'privates" conversation. Tell him it is okay to touch his private parts, in private. It is NOT okay to allow anyone else to do so. You also need to tell him it was not okay that he touched the other boys privates parts. Explain that you understand it feels good but it is not acceptable to touch others or let them touch him. Ask him if anyone else has tried touch his privates. Make sure the other boys family knows.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 11:36 PM on Jun. 24, 2011

  • is this friend male or female?
    mubbie

    Answer by mubbie at 11:40 PM on Jun. 24, 2011

  • Male
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:45 PM on Jun. 24, 2011

  • wow...what a hard situation. you need to have a talk with him. don't get upset, but he needs to know about why his private parts are private...
    Kainalu55

    Answer by Kainalu55 at 2:54 AM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • I agree withGrnEyedGrandma - to an extent. I don't think they were necessarily touching each other because it felt good. But, I didn't walk in on it so I could be wrong. Exploring could be just that, exploring. I'll show you mine if you show me yours. Either way, telling him his penis supposed to be private though is a good way to start. And I would think before telling the other boy's family too. If you know them well and they are good people, then by all means tell. If not though, you don't want your own son getting the blame or this being blown out of proportion, then being humiliated publicly at school or something. Just tread softly and don't make a giant deal out of it. I would have NO IDEA where to take it from there though. Just don't shame him or or give him a complex, whatever you do! Good luck with that one!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:56 AM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • this is pretty standard behavior for this age. Just explain that even though you know he is curious, that this kind of behavior is inappropriate. Don't freak, and try to stay calm. You can feel him to see what kind of questions he might have (you didn't say if friend was male or female) or maybe his dad would feel more comfortable talking to him.
    elasmimi

    Answer by elasmimi at 6:00 PM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • This might be the time to have the conversation about 'private areas'
    dixiegurl223626

    Answer by dixiegurl223626 at 7:54 PM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • I agree with those that said to sit down and have a talk with him. Try to stay as calm as possible and be prepared to answer any questions. Good luck!
    Charizma77

    Answer by Charizma77 at 9:32 PM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • Reinforce the private parts talk. It's ok to touch your own, but not ok for others to touch yours or you to touch others. Don't be hard on him, it's normal experimentation (you show me yours, I'll show you mine sort of stuff). I'd let him ask questions of you in case he has any as well.
    SherriPie

    Answer by SherriPie at 11:29 PM on Jun. 25, 2011

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