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Any Moms out there with chronic illnesses?

Any Moms out there with chronic illnesses - get tired and frustrated with feeling tired and frustrated all the time? Feeling extra frustrated about trying to spend quality time with children while not feeling well? Feeling extra frustrated about not having enough energy to take care of household stuff? Frustrated that sometimes taking care of oneself means "resting" and then feel bad about "wasting" another whole day. How do you deal with the frustration?

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Jmomma532

Asked by Jmomma532 at 12:24 AM on Jun. 25, 2011 in Health

Level 6 (119 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • I know exactly what youre talking about.... I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia and Chronic fatigue syndrome about 15 years ago. My daughter was 3 at the time. I would work all day,then drag myelf to pick her up from daycare,and then fight sleep on the way home. My doctor finally told me I had to make a decision between the extra $ or spending time wioth my family. I was literally a mess. Its very hard not feeling guilty,as anyone who knows anything about these conditions will attest that its almost impossible to be available every second to your child/childrn. I dont think I would have made it if I would have had more than the one. I feel like I neglected her sometimes,now that I look back on it. Ive really been blessed with a wonderful,understanding husband who doesnt mind if I dont feellike making dinner,or if the dishes arent done that day. Children cant understand medical issues though or why you feel so crappy.
    phall1069

    Answer by phall1069 at 12:33 AM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • (contd) The best thing I know to tell you is show them lots of love when you are having a decent day,caue you know the next probably couple or 3 days arent gonna be worth a sh#*. They finally grow to understand that mom has an illness that is beyond her control and they will,I think become more self sufficient. As for the guilt,Im the guilt master! I dont think there's really anything you can do about it,because a good mother will feel guilty about things like this out of her control. Sometimes you just need the rest to function half way like a human. Makes it especially hard when its an invisble illness (one that isnt obvious to people). Then you hafe to deal with all the judgments of people around you too. I hope you can find som relief from your illness. Be the best mom you can be. Thats all you can do when you are sick.
    phall1069

    Answer by phall1069 at 12:39 AM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • I have several major chronic illnesses and they really get me depressed, which makes me run in a circle of guilt. I have learned to be kind to myself, I know my limitations and I have accepted that I can no longer have a home that you would want to see in Better Homes and Gardens. Some days are better than others, and when a really bad day or days hit, I just learn to accept what little I can do. I have been dealing with this for many years and somehow, as a single Mom, I got the two children grown and sent to college. My body finally gave out during my sons Senior year in high school.
    Joeygoat

    Answer by Joeygoat at 12:41 AM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • chronic back pain, sucks
    i try to be spiritual not physical to cope
    lizzybee44

    Answer by lizzybee44 at 1:33 AM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • I don't have a chronic illness but I am disabled due to an accident. My younger sister suffers from Neurofibramatosis. She has constant pain and tumors all over her body. It is a scary disease. She is so strong, I admire her.
    bcauseimthemom

    Answer by bcauseimthemom at 1:52 AM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • It is really hard for me. I think the hardest part is that I have to hide my bad days from everyone because my husband doesn't want to hear about it and my kids are too young to understand. So I drag and drag, and then have to hup-to when I know my husband is on the way home and clean, vacuum, dishes . . . to hide the fact that i felt so crappy that I couldn't get to it earlier.
    I feel terrible today. I had to go to the doctor, and my husband has no idea. He'd just say,"Again?" and roll his eyes at me, so I don't even tell him.
    It's hard. I keep wishing that i'll just wake up tomorrow morning and feel good again. But, day after day, it never happens. I don't know how to deal.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:37 AM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • i think u should continue to search for answers to your illness
    maybe your taking too many meds that make you tires, maybe your taking the wrong meds
    or maybe none at all, either way i would hope your not in any pain
    if you are, there's help out there and answers even if it takes years to find what's right for you
    keep searching, u can lay in bed while doing so and do not feel bad at all, if you didn't rest your body would be ill at ease
    so continue to search and when the frustration comes, remind yourself there's a cure you just have to find it
    lizzybee44

    Answer by lizzybee44 at 1:48 PM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • tired*
    lizzybee44

    Answer by lizzybee44 at 1:48 PM on Jun. 25, 2011

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