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Why Won't They Listen? adult content

Two years ago, my husband died suddenly from a brain aneurysm. Ever since then, my friends and co-workers have been trying to get me to start dating again. They send me Facebook pages, give me phone numbers, try introducing me to friends of friends, you name it. My husband was my best friend and the love of my life, we were married for 20 years and I have zero interest in dating anyone. I have said this in plain English to everyone. Nobody is paying me any mind, they say things like "You're too young to lock it up and throw away the key." and "It's not good for you to be alone so much." I usually ignore the Facebook links and don't write the phone numbers down. Last night was the last straw. It was "girl's night" with my friends and one of them allegedly "ran into" a man she knew and dragged him over to our table. It was so obvious that this encounter was anything but random. I was polite to the man, nothing more. At one point everyone else was getting drinks or going to the bathroom so the man and I were sitting alone together. He said "I hear you're pretty desperate for a good f*ck. I don't mind helping you out with that even though you really aren't my type, we could exchange numbers for booty calls or something." KABOOM! I threw my drink in his face and unleashed a spate of vindictive that half the bar could hear, including my so-called friends. He called me some choice names, turned to the friend of mine responsible for this and said "You said she was horny and up for anything!"

I may never speak to these people again. I thought they were my friends, but it's pretty clear that they don't know me at all! I'm hurt and angry and the whole situation has just left me even lonelier for my husband.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 9:17 AM on Jun. 25, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • sorry you went through that. I'm going through the "we must set you up" phase with my neighbors. They are all very old fashioned (and older) and don't think it is right for a woman with two kids to live on her own, they believe you need a man in your life. It's getting annoying but I smile and meet everyone they shove at me. I will say, if it ever gets to the point where they send me some horn dog i will do exactly as you did. what a jerk and what crappy friends for even saying that!

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:20 AM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • Oh my gosh. I don''t know how old your friends are but they sound extremely immature, and all they want out of the whole thing is a few laughs and entertainment. I can see how they may want to help you heal and move on, but they can't seem to understand how devastating it was for you to lose your soul mate--that;s something I don't think I could ever make peace with! Where is the respect they have for you?? Get rid of them, please. It makes me mad just reading about what happened.

    Answer by a.emily at 9:26 AM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • Some of these girls may really care about you and not want you to be lonely. But the girl who told this guy you were horny and such is NOT a friend of yours. Apparently she doesn't even know decent guys, ones who would never say what he said to you. I would find new friends or at least weed out the ones who will listen to you and will just be your friend not your matchmaker. Sorry you had to go through that, but at least you know what that one gal was saying about you behind your back. Don't trust that bitch!

    Answer by courtcaton at 9:31 AM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • I'm so sorry that happened! You need to go find some new friends.

    Answer by SWasson at 9:32 AM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • Those are not friends. They disrespected you all the way around. I am so sorry to hear you went through this. What a jerk.

    Answer by pookiekins34 at 9:33 AM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • I would not be returning that woman's calls anytime soon. It doesn't sound like anything a "friend" would do, even if you were interested in dating! I am sorry that you had to go through that!

    Answer by AF4life at 9:39 AM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • I'm sorry hun, your friends sound immature and not the kind of people you need in your life, a true friend would respect your wishes and not push so hard, maybe you should distance yourself from these people, I feel for you that had to be embarassing for you.

    Answer by momto4girzls at 10:20 AM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • In think there only trying tonlook out for you

    Answer by Helen2004 at 11:19 AM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • Oh sweetie that's HORRIBLE .. I agree with the other girls, those people are not your friends at all, and sound very immature. I'm so sorry you lost your husband and feel so alone in a world of shallow idiotic people, but everyone isn't like that! You deserve friends who understand and respect you but at least you have us, and can come here and vent! Oh and huge kudos to you for throwing a drink in that guys face! What an ass!! People are so casual about sex these days, I bet he didn't even have an inkling that he was being innapropriate until he was drenched! There are some women that would have went for that offer, he got a good lesson from you showing him there are still women in this world who have integrity and deserve to be treated like a lady. Good for you!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:25 AM on Jun. 25, 2011

  • OMG! I am so sorry and yes they are NOT your friend if they were they would respect you and be there for you and hang out without pressuring you. And to tell a strange man you were I would be pissed too that wasn't cool at all. You do need to leave these ladies alone and do what you want to do and if that means staying home at least you will have a piece of mind.

    When your ready to date you will but if you don't want to, don't let anyone push you into it.....just curious have they called you after that...your friends. Hey if you need a friend please put me on your email list and we can talk anytime day or night. I was a widow at a young age and i know the pain you are going through and no one should push you into doing anything your not ready for.....

    Answer by dusty1962 at 7:47 PM on Jun. 25, 2011

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