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5 Bumps

I am 18 and pregnant and very scared.

My twin sister is 5 months pregnant and the family just started to accept it. Now im pregnant and i don't know how to confront my outside family. My mother already know's and told me its my decision on what to do. I only knew the babies father for 2 month's and now i may have to dedicate my life to him and his baby. I want to get an abortion, but that is against my spirituality and im scared that it will affect me my entire life. I can't live life as a hypocrite, but i still want a life. I will have to have the baby 4 hours from home by my boyfriends. I feel so limited and locked in. I want to feel free for my brand new life that hasn't even started yet. Can i still have a life and do what i always wanted to do with a baby? OR should i get an abortion and move on? please help:(

Answer Question
 
laymybay

Asked by laymybay at 9:51 AM on Jun. 26, 2011 in Pregnancy

Level 3 (13 Credits)
Answers (23)
  • You have to do what you think is best.
    Chloesmom1126

    Answer by Chloesmom1126 at 9:52 AM on Jun. 26, 2011

  • only you can make this decision hun. but honestly, if you have ANY doubts about having an abortion, then don't, because you can't undo it once it's done. if you feel it's right though, then do what you think is right. just make sure you think it through and are 100% confident in your decision.
    tnm786

    Answer by tnm786 at 9:53 AM on Jun. 26, 2011

  • I think you should have it. I only say that because I had one as a teen and it went against my beliefs and haunts me still and I am middle aged. It will all work out. I was 18 when I had my first baby too and it was scary but you will have your sister and parents there. I believe everything happens for a reason. But if you do not believe in abortion it will stay with you.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:54 AM on Jun. 26, 2011

  • Do what you think is best. I'm 28 and pregnant with my first child. I also did not know that daddy very long. If I were 18 I would probably have done an open adoption. Having a child is a beautiful life changing event. Only you know if you are capable of caring for a child.
    plaidgirl28

    Answer by plaidgirl28 at 9:57 AM on Jun. 26, 2011

  • A baby isn't the end of your life, but the beginning of a life with someone very special and a part of you. You were granted a gift that a lot of women can only dream about. You can take that baby on the journey of life with you. There is no reason you cannot go on to school or whatever you dream of with this little life with you. I am staunchly against abortion, but I'm telling you not to have one based on my beliefs, but on yours. If you already have a niggling feeling you might regret something, then never go through with it. It's our little mechanisms that help us not make a mistake. And that goes for ANYTIME you hear that doubt, not just this situation. You'll do just fine. And your sister already paved the road, it'll be easier for you. It's always easier to accept it the second time.
    attap5

    Answer by attap5 at 10:00 AM on Jun. 26, 2011

  • sweetie do wat you think is right..i had my 1st when i was 17 and yes it changed my life but i was still able to go out and do some of the things i wanted to do..the only thing that was diffrent was my baby came first and yes the dad if you should decide to keep the baby should know he can help and if he doesnt want to then youll find a good man who will!!!!...and adoption is always an option as well..dont think bc your haveing a baby its the end of your life that hasnt even began yet just think of it as a diffrent start to life..looking back i cant emagine if i didnt have my lil girl in my life ..it was hard and i had challanges but i would trade them for the world..this is your personal decision no one can make it for you..no one will judge you for it..good luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    rachel216

    Answer by rachel216 at 10:01 AM on Jun. 26, 2011

  • think about adoption before you KILL a life u created. u owe it to that child to let it live!!!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:03 AM on Jun. 26, 2011

  • Hey. I'm a teen mum myself, and I've considered all three options. I chose parenting but it's important that you decide what makes sense for you. If you want to talk, vent, or commiserate, go ahead and message me. As for "having a life"... Well we're not sure what you mean. Do you mean partying? Because no, you can't really do that. Or do you mean going to school, postsecondary, career kind of thing? Because that's definitely possible. I could have written this exact post about a year ago. Now I have plans to get my PHD, even with a baby.
    kit_manson

    Answer by kit_manson at 10:09 AM on Jun. 26, 2011

  • if abortion is against your spirit
    and you feel to young and free to raise a child
    have you thought of adoption

    this option was not mentioned by you
    a hard one but fits both your concerns
    fiatpax

    Answer by fiatpax at 10:12 AM on Jun. 26, 2011

  • I agree. There are other options besides abortion. You can do adoption so that you can still grow up and let the baby have a chance at a life your not sure you can give it. And if you still want to be a part of the childs life, there is always open adoption. Ultimately it is your choice on what you want to do. But having a child is not the end of the world or your life. You may not get to do every thing that you want and you'll have to readjust your plans for life but having a baby is precious. If you really dont want a baby this young and you really dont think you cant take care of a baby yet then consider adoption and giving that baby a chance at a good life with people who want children and most likely cant have their own and who will love that baby.
    SMG1120

    Answer by SMG1120 at 10:12 AM on Jun. 26, 2011

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