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My daughter snuck out in the early a.m., she's 13...HELP!!

This is my youngest child. We have always had the "norm" teen stuff with the oldest daughter, a lot more stuff with our 16 yr. old son but, this is supposed to not happen with the youngest. I'm prepared for the mood swings and attitudes at times, school work and arguing about clothes and chores but, not being called @ 4:30 in the morning by an officer telling me she's joy riding with 2 friends. She's already been talked to b4 this and still did it again. Has anyboy been here?!

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Asked by hmsclmomof3 at 7:18 AM on Dec. 14, 2008 in Teens (13-17)

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Answers (9)
  • No lol i wouldnt have even attempted to try that, I would have been grounded untill i could move out. Or when i did get ungrounded i wouldnt be able to do much with just my friends & i.

    Answer by AriaxKatriina at 8:53 AM on Dec. 14, 2008

  • Mine did that stuff but he was a little older. I don't have any advice because nothing I did worked. My neighbor basically took away all her sons friends and he stopped but he is now 18 and a loner?

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:13 AM on Dec. 14, 2008

  • Well she is acting out I used too you are just going to have to be firm

    Answer by Everettsmom163 at 9:15 AM on Dec. 14, 2008

  • Allow her to spend a night in jail, do not get her out. Let her see that if she acts like that, then she has to pay the price. I will do the same to no tv, no phone, no ipod, no anything for X amount of time. All mine would do is school, with me verifying that they are there, homework and then sitting in front of me so I can see where they are at.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:19 AM on Dec. 14, 2008

  • my 15yr old daughter started last year after my mother passed. her life has not been easy to say the least but I belive once my mom died it sent her over the edge. NOTHING has worked, she has even been in juvi a couple times. still she is out of control. Has anything happend that may have pushed her to this kind of behavior? maybe it's time to dig deeper.
    best of luck.

    Answer by angela89 at 3:49 PM on Dec. 14, 2008

  • My son snuck out last year when he was 14 and the dumb a$$ had the nerve to knock on the door b/c he forgot his key and the dogs barked. Hubby let him in told him to go to bed and we would talk about it in the a.m. It was right before a big new years eve party he was really looking forward to so we took away that and his computer for Christmas break and he hasn't done it again. So while we haven't had to deal with the police (yet-never say never) I agree if nothing else is working and she has done this before tell her if you get a call from the police again she will spend the night in jail.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:32 PM on Dec. 14, 2008

  • Ask her what she would do if she were you. Just reverse roles for a few minutes and see what she says. It's not like it can hurt to try.

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:50 PM on Dec. 14, 2008

  • I did it once, and even tried pot for the first time. But OHHHHH I learned my lesson. Turns out I"m seriously allergic to cannabis. I broke out in a serious rash all over my face, hands, and inside my mouth. NEVER snuck out again or tried pot. IF you can afford it I'd get an alarm system, and set it on instant at night, but leave it off during the day. Don't give her the code :-) Also let her know that next time she does it, you will let the cop take her to the nearest youth detention/metro jail for the night. Nothing like a scared straight program! I would also find out who these other friends are and call their moms, tell them nothing personal but if your daughter goes to their houses, they are to turn her away and call you. She doesn't need to be with those girls anymore.

    Answer by katzmeow726 at 1:22 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • Once I saw this alarm thing that you stuck in front of the door, like a wedge - only instead of keeping the door closed, it would move when it was opened, and it would let out this ear splitting noise. I would get one of them for her bedroom door, and also get alarms of some sort for her window - that, or put plastic over her window and let her know that you WILL be inspecting it EVERY day to see if it's been tampered with.

    That way, in an emergency, she can get out, but even to go to the bathroom, she'll have to wake up the whole house, so you know where she is at all times. Explain that trust, once lost, has to be earned back, and this is what happens when you don't trust her.

    Also, frankly, I would use some tough love, and let her know that the next time, her butt can sit at the police station for awhile!

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 2:03 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

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