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8 Bumps

OMG I FEEL SO HELPLESS! adult content

To help you better understand why here is my story... I am a victim of domestic violence. My eldest son and I were abused for years by my Husband. I left my husband back in March of 2009. He found me and held me against my will for three weeks in Feb 2010 and I managed to escape.

While I was in Shelter; the courts awarded him full custody of my two babies in March of 2010. I missed the court date because I was in the Shelter. It has been a living hell since and at the time I have not been back in court since August to fight. I could not afford a lawyer and my court appointed on was a POS. She never submitted any evidence into court on my behalf; And I missed the trail because of transportation issues. So needless to say he has gotten off free.

Well my 4yr old called me this evening without my husband's knowledge and was crying hysterically. He kept telling me that daddy hurt him real bad and hit him! When I tried to ask him what happened; my husband ripped the phone out of his hands; told me to mind my own damn business and hung up! I called CPS; but I feel sooooo helpless! CPS always comes back as unfounded; even after my eldest told them what he did! (He has a friend that is in the head department for CPS; but I can't prove it). I don't know what to do anymore; I feel so damn helpless as a mother! My job is to protect my babies; and I feel like I have failed them!

I don't know how many times I have sat and argued with CPS before; I am soooo sick of wasting my time! My daughter has had a diaper rash and yeast infection before on numerous ocasions; unfounded. He brought them around a level two sex offender and left my kids alone with him; unfounded (waas told t simply keep him away from the kids). My kids lived in a cockroach infested trailer; but it was okay since he was making an attempt to get rid of them! What the hell happened to CPS protecting our children?!?!?  Sorry for venting but I feel so helpless here!!!

 
Mom_Of_3_Angelz

Asked by Mom_Of_3_Angelz at 11:45 PM on Jun. 26, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 15 (2,047 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (20)
  • instead of saying anything ugly or rude what I offer you is this, May God wrap is hands around your children and keep them safe, may he find a way to make his will known, may the love of a mother and child stay in the hearts or your children, may you see there smiling face, and may God give you the help and motivation you need to get threw this, may his love and light surround you and your situation, In Gods name I pray for the safety of you and your children. and believe one thing, Noone has the right to judge you, when someone points the finger it means theres three more pointing back at them. Noone is a perfect parent, we all fall short or perfection, noone has always done everything right, so may this prayer help you in your journey .
    kellylong78

    Answer by kellylong78 at 9:45 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • Attacking the victim is NOT the answer here! A woman reaching out in desperation obviously wants to find a solution, and is opening up to vulnerability. Lets keep comments in the positive and helpful.

    Dear Mom of 3 angels: You need to find a lawyer to help you or a Child Advocacy Rep. Breathe through this. The more calm and collected you can be, gathering as much hard evidence as you can, the better off you will appear. Make EVERY effort you can to show up to court. You and your son also deserve compassion and therapy. I've lived through similar circumstances and the hardest part in the world is the secret shame you live with believing this could have happened to you. Check to see if there are sliding scale councilors available.

    I'm so sorry you have gone through this, but you have the strength to take your power back. Good Luck.
    Salome909

    Answer by Salome909 at 12:14 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • why were the kids not with you at the shelter? Get a job and go back to court with proof of his violent behavior. Be there at the court next time. Honestly I would go back and protect my children...Get proof...as dangerous as that sounds. Get the police, get a social worker, find a lawyer that will let you make payments, go to church...get everyone involved. You can do this.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:53 PM on Jun. 26, 2011

  • I don't see why you went to the shelter without the kids. Couldn't you find a shelter to accept you all?
    Next time, tell your child to call 911 instead of calling you. The police will show up. I doubt he has friends in the police dept.
    MoNKeyBoyz

    Answer by MoNKeyBoyz at 12:04 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • Hugs... here is a BUMP for you
    sarasmommy777

    Answer by sarasmommy777 at 11:47 PM on Jun. 26, 2011

  • The very second my ex touched my daughter, I protected her and left. Why did u let him abuse your oldest for years as u said?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:59 PM on Jun. 26, 2011

  • I'm not understanding,,, if he held you for weeks, why were charges not filed? Is there a supervisor in CPS that you can talk to and light a fire under?
    Danni143

    Answer by Danni143 at 12:06 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • Don't bother with CPS, I agree with MoNKeyBoyz just call the police.
    knittymom4

    Answer by knittymom4 at 12:09 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • Where do you live? I mean what state do you live in? I can't believe that you have to go through this crap honey. I'm so sorry, I hope things get better for you. I too, left an abusive husband. I am just sorry I didn't wait till he was asleep and take a baseball bat to him! Not that I am suggesting! LOL I would be going nuts, I don't know how you are doing it! Hugs and prayers are coming your way!
    MamaAlice54

    Answer by MamaAlice54 at 4:03 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • butterflytry to pull yourself up and get on your feet and start taking action on the advice these moms gave you ,you can over come this so don't give up!

    Sarah961

    Answer by Sarah961 at 4:06 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

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