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For military spouses

my Dh is about to deploy for the first time. He leaves in 24 days and will be gone six months. He's going to miss the birth of our second child, Halloween, thanksgiving, Christmas, my birthday... The list goes on. I know I'll be able to talk with him on the phone, and hopefully skype as well, but I'm just wondering if you guys have any suggestions for making his leaving easier, or any helpful advice.

Thanks in advance. I have a heavy heart at the thought of losing my other half for so long :(


Asked by Anonymous at 4:19 AM on Jun. 27, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • It's never easy when your man has to leave. My advice is to try to keep yourself occupied as much as possible, get together with friends, find that support group you need in case something happens and really try to think positive. My husband was gone for a year shortly after we got married and it was tough. What made it easy was keeping busy and having friends over. Best of luck!

    Answer by Imogine at 4:27 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • My husband and I are both military. We have both had to leave. It is tough. Here is the best advice I can give you.

    Be supportive of him. It is going to be tough on him. The more supportive you are of him the easier it will be for him to support you.

    Get involved with other spouses. There should be a spouse group on your base.

    Keep a daily journal. Write everything down. Keep a second journal of things he is missing. Cute things your child does, special events, and so on.

    Speak up. Let your feelings be known. I remember a Christmas without my husband. I was feeling sad and alone even with all my family. I figured they knew I was sad. Not the case. Speak up.

    Do not watch the daily news. It will upset you.

    Don't stress if you don't hear from him each day. He is going to be extremely busy. And don't be upset if e-mails are short. Be happy he is able to communicate.

    PM me with ques

    Answer by Shaken1976 at 8:25 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • The first time he left I was torn up. I cried, I was depressed. By the second time I had friends with kids, we went out and did stuff and had fun. When he came back it was like "oh, were you gone?" Lol.

    Answer by emmyandlisa at 8:43 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • keep up communication is the biggest. my hubbys first deployment he didnt call until our second baby was 12hrs old (and i was in labor for 30hrs). i let the depression rule on the deployment and i regret it, his second was a short one so he came home when number 3 was 4wks old, and this last one our 4th and final baby was 4wks when he left. this time around we kept up communication and were very honest with our feelings. i also kept busy with the kids, even if it ment we sat around on a rainy afternoon eating junk food and watching old movies. but always be honest and if it gets hard ask for help and use the resources available. and while yes it is a very hard and sad thing to go through, look for some positives (i dragged my mom to every shoe store and me and my sister spent an hour looking at purses). if you need to talk feel free to pm me

    Answer by tiffanyv123 at 9:36 AM on Jun. 27, 2011