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If your Mom has passed away; how do you handle your Mom being gone?

My Mom passed away in 2004 and I miss her tremendously and there are days I find myself going to the phone and starting to dial her number and then realize she isn't there anymore to pick up the phone and the tears start again and now we have lost my childhood home to foreclosure so I feel like I have failed her there also.  Does anyone else go through this and how do you handle it?


Asked by Christmaslver68 at 6:33 AM on Jun. 27, 2011 in Relationships

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Answers (7)
  • That's so sad, sorry for your loss. I'm sure that's so very hard! I feel that way about my grandma, she was like my mother and I think about her all the time. I look at her picture and talk to her, i do believe she hears me! :)


    Answer by anichols1 at 6:56 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • Yes, I know what you mean. I say "I gotta tell mom that" and then I remember she is gone (2 years now). I can laugh again and think "mom would have loved that joke", etc.  And a couple of relatives always speak lovingly about her which helps me a lot.   The worst part when dealing with others is those who tell me I should be "over it" by now.  I would like to slap them!  It does get easier to accept but I will never understand why this has to be this way. I mean why is this the human condition? Couldn't it have been some other way?  I wish you all the best and I'm sorry for your loss.  hug


    Answer by whitepeppers at 7:00 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • I lost my mom very suddenly back in August. I still haven't woke up from what seems like the longest nightmare ever. I'm not handling it well at all so any advice you guys have I'd love to hear. I miss her so much.

    Answer by PTmomma3 at 9:24 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • My mother has been gone almost 4 years and I dont think theres anyone who can answer these questions for us. The "youre not alone" doesnt help. The "time will heal" doesnt work. I dont think I ever got to a point where thinking about her hurts less, I just force myself not to think about her as often...which then makes me feel like I dont care as much as I should of, and brings a whole new rush of guilt. My DH lost his mother in 2009 and his father just 4 months later. So, our family has seen its fair share of loss in the parents department and it never gets better. And, now, whenever something happens to someone I love, even a minor cold or simple surgery...I think of my mother. It could be COMPLETELY my father just had knee replacement surgery, and all I could think about was my mom. I feel all of your pain, and i'm sure you relate to mine. I'm sorry I wasnt nore uplifting.

    Answer by mlmkjw at 9:51 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • i ahvent lost my mum, but i lost my gran and she was like a second mum, best friend and everything to me, i miss her soooo much and find it very hard to accept that she is gone, i actually dread feeling like this and missing her so much with so much life ahead of me, dont think i will ever feel better about it. i still cry everyday.

    Answer by proud-mummy at 7:01 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • Why not write a letter to your mother when you feel the need to talk to her? Or what about going to her grave and simply talking to her there? I don't think your mom would think that you failed her. You tried the best you could. No fault in that. Also, do you have something that she used to love? Be it a favourite shirt, stuff animal, throw, something. Why not hold that close to you when you miss her? I still have and sleep with my blankie that my grandmother gave me. she died of liver cancer when I was 6 yrs old. I am now 40. No one has ever made fun of me for it. Not any boyfriend or lover or any friend. Everyone misses someone they have lost and if something helps with the grief, then what is the problem? As long as you aren't a danger to yourself or others and not laying in bed while the kids burn the house down and remember that you have living people that love you, it should be good.

    Answer by Sithpadawans at 12:35 PM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • I do Sithpadawans I was asking how others handle it

    Comment by Christmaslver68 (original poster) at 12:48 PM on Jun. 27, 2011