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My 16yr/old son sneaks out of his bedroom at night to play xBox live in the family room...

He ends up staying awake all night playing games and talking on his cell phone. I know school is out, but when he stays up all night, he tends to sleep a lot during the day, doesn't wash and is grumpy and sometimes mean. It's difficult to get him motivated to do anything during the day with the family or with friends.

Not sure how to handle this, (or if I even need to handle this) - he lies a lot and I am tired of confronting with him about the truth or why he needs to take better care of himself.

Any advice would be wonderful.

Thanks!

 
grace61

Asked by grace61 at 7:39 AM on Jun. 27, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Level 5 (94 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (22)
  • I would just tell him that he now has the privilege of staying up late and using his phone and xbox, no "sneaking" required. BUT in order to keep the privilege, then he has to be up by say, 10:30, showered and ready for the day by lunch. Just make it very cut-and-dry. If X then Y. If he doesn't follow through with getting up and showered, then that night you take his phone and the xbox controllers. Don't let him manipulate you, keep emotion out of it on your end and he won't have any ammunition. :] Good luck!
    Its.Me.T.

    Answer by Its.Me.T. at 2:35 PM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • This is simple. Remove the Xbox. It is not being used properly it goes for a month or so.
    tootoobusy

    Answer by tootoobusy at 7:42 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • Sounds like he needs a summer job.
    Dr.Donna

    Answer by Dr.Donna at 7:42 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • There are so many worse things a 16 year old boy can be up to in the middle of the night then playing games and talking on the phone. When my son was that age he stayed up very late (he still does 10 years later) but he knew he was expected to be up at a certain time and bad moods did not work. Now he works various shifts, stays up late but always gets up in time for work and is cheerful no matter how much sleep he gets. Set a time you can live with for him to get up, make sure he gets up and don't let him get away with bad moods.
    Keksie

    Answer by Keksie at 7:48 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • If he can't be responsible and do what he is supposed to then he needs to hand over the cell phone at a certain time each evening and the XBox controllers go to bed with you.
    Shaken1976

    Answer by Shaken1976 at 7:50 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • Take the power cord out of the XBox when you go to bed. And the cell phone - we have a no cell phone in bedrooms after 9pm policy in our household. We have a charging station in the living room and all cell phones go into that.
    And sorry but the idea that a 16 yr old doesn't need a bedtime in the summer is BULL!! Teenagers NEED THEIR SLEEP!! They need it MORE THAN WE DO!!!
    twinsplus2more

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 8:08 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • Wow, you can tell Armywife has no teenagers when she recommends that a 16 year old needs no bedtime!

    Until you have teenagers (Or children period) of your own - don't ever give advice like that!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:31 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • Anonymous - I answered about getting a job based on raising my step-daughter. No, my two boys are 10 and 6, but that doesn't mean I don't understand what it's like to have a teen in the house.

    Yes - he needs a job, or something for which he is responsible. No person should have so much free time on their hands that staying up through the middle of the night and accomplishing nothing else during their day is an option. Accomplishing things with life is what leads to success and satisfaction in the long run. Laying around, accomplishing nothing, and being a leech off of your family and society doesn't breed a sense of self-worth or self-respect. It breeds a sense of entitlement. I don't need to know anything about this woman's situation to know that the human psyche works that way.

    He's developing the habits he'll have as a man right now.
    Dr.Donna

    Answer by Dr.Donna at 10:19 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • I like both of the previous answers
    slw123

    Answer by slw123 at 7:45 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • I got a 14 yr old that's like that..She's got insomnia bad which I found out is a pretty common prob with teens. I had it bad when I was a teen too. We used melatonin to help herself. Most recently she went to camp for a week and that got her back on a proper night/day schedule. Maybe if your son had more daytime activities to enjoy like going to the Y or Boys/Girls clubs gymn he'd be more prone to daytime activities
    Cenedra64

    Answer by Cenedra64 at 7:59 AM on Jun. 27, 2011

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