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Is anyone else in a relationship that always seems to go downhill?

We have been together almost 2 years (in September). Our baby is due December 5th. I love him to death, and I think he loves me. But we always fight, mostly over stupid little stuff. It's like, he's lied so much that I can't seem to trust him now. IDK what to do. Today he decided he wanted to take time apart to work on his financial state. Fine, I'm tired of fighting and our baby doesn't deserve to go through the stress that mommy goes through. But I just don't know what to do... is it possible for us to work things out in the end? Has anyone been there already? I mean, we were split up for 2 or 3 weeks when I found out I was pregnant... and it's like that automatically put us back together. Somebody please help :(

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AngelBaby90

Asked by AngelBaby90 at 12:03 PM on Jun. 27, 2011 in Relationships

Level 6 (121 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • I was. Then we got divorced.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 12:04 PM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • It takes two hun. Both need to work at it. My soon to be ex husband gets lonely and tries for a couple days then its back to normal arguing and I'm finally done. I give too much to not get anything back.
    sugamama3

    Answer by sugamama3 at 12:07 PM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • Sometimes we are good for a week or two at a time... then it's like he lies or does something to piss me off and it's bad all over again. I want us to work, especially now since we have a baby on the way. but it's getting harder... I'm almost ready to just let it go completely.
    AngelBaby90

    Comment by AngelBaby90 (original poster) at 12:10 PM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • I left it was too much work.
    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 12:14 PM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • If you two are constantly fighting over silly things then the quickest fix is a break from each other. Who is someone in your life that you find soothing? For me, it is my mom and I have 2 friends that I call my friend therapists because they tell me what I need to hear. Find that person and stay with them so you can figure out why you are always fighting and he can do some soul searching himself. Plus, you are preggo and the baby feels what you feel so be around people who make you feel loved so you can make your little jelly bean feel extra, extra loved. By the way, do you have a pink or blue jellybean? :)
    Gingerwheel

    Answer by Gingerwheel at 12:16 PM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • By the way, I was in the exact situation you are in now. I stayed with my mom and friends from month 4 - month 7 of being preggo and now my SO and I much better. He has some really bad habits he needed to break himself of in that time period. I gave him tough love all the way. I didn't talk to him at all the first month.
    Gingerwheel

    Answer by Gingerwheel at 12:19 PM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • A baby on the way usually isn't going to magically make a relationship that wasn't perfect before suddenly turn into a fairy tale scenario. You say you aren't sure if he loves you? That says alot right there. If you hadn't found out that you were pregnant and gotten back together because of that, then you might still be apart from when you spllit for that 2-3 week period and have gone your seperate ways. It's possible that it can work out , nothings impossible if you both try really hard. It won't be easy...it doesn't sound like it anyway. It's going to take some giving and taking on both parts.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:21 PM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • It is very hard work to be happy in a marriage but it takes both of u to make it. If u gave it ur all and he won't it's time to move on. Also a baby should not be the reason u stay together it's hard to be alone with a new one but sometimes it's for the best. I hope it works out for u :)
    Daisysjewels

    Answer by Daisysjewels at 12:24 PM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • Ginger... I do not know if I'm having a boy or girl yet... I find out July 21st :)

    And Anon... I know it's not gonna magically rearrange itself overnight... it's just hard. because we wanted to work things out slowly in the beginning, before I was pregnant. I feel we both have issues we need to work on... mine is my insecurities and jealousy, his is his lying and his finances. It's just so hard to think of us not being together when this is what we've wanted for so long. It just sucks that it happened this way... But I guess that's how it goes usually... don't get pregnant until after you've split :(
    AngelBaby90

    Comment by AngelBaby90 (original poster) at 12:27 PM on Jun. 27, 2011

  • if my BF lied, i'd have the same issues as you... can he control his lying? BF has a friend who cant control it- he told his GF that he is a college graduate... he barely passed HS nad never even applied to a college! no degree- no diploma to believe it... but she believes him. lol he seriously cannot control it-- i dunno if its a certain high that he gets when he lies, but maybe your BF is the same way; I read somewhere that to pathological liars- it does something to the brain, like a drug, a need.
    Shy_Dia

    Answer by Shy_Dia at 1:33 PM on Jun. 27, 2011

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