Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How do I stay sane dealing with my overly needy demanding spoikled stepdaughter?


I have lived with my bf for 6 mos now. We plan on getting married. He has a 13 year old son who is easy going and respectful. His daughter on the other hand who is 11 is spoiled and overly demanding. She constantly asks for anything and everything, and i already have 3 children of my own, the youngest of which is 3. I am aalready stressed out. I honestly can't stand to be around her anymore, and he has his kids half the time! He is a very sucessfull, nice guy who is really good to me . He is also really hyper and demanding. I am by nature more introverted and seek peace and quiet to relax. This is impossible now and I am getting really angry and resentful. I have talked to him about how he spoils his daughter etc etc. She still wont stop.

I don't know what to do but fantasize about leaving.

Answer Question

Asked by kvv at 5:04 AM on Jun. 29, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 3 (17 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • Leave now. Most stepkids don't change. This girl probably thinks her daddy owes her the world. If this girl is already acting this bad now, she will act worse when ya'll get married. I been a stepmom for 30 yrs. now and it's still not got any better for me.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:42 AM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • You really need to reconsider if this is the right thing for you. I agree it will only get worse. If he has not listened to you and made some changes he never will. Plus it's his child, not yours, so the cards are stacked against you right now. hug

    Answer by whitepeppers at 7:25 AM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • Been there, still there. Basically, you have 3 options. 1. Continue on with the relationship but know it will probably not get better.
    2. End the relationship. And number 3 (and what I wish I would have done) Continue the relationship but not live together or get married until the kids are 18.

    I love my dh but knowing what I know now I wish I would have choosen number 3. I too, am a person who seeks peace and quiet and relaxation and it has been 7 years and I still don't have it. Good luck to you!

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:38 AM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • Proceed with caution, dear.

    Answer by BluDog at 10:01 AM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • First of all, she's not your stepdaughter. She's your boyfriend's daughter.
    Wait til your kids are old enough to get "attitude"!
    3 under 3 and living with your boyfriend? Really?
    Leave. Now. You have ZERO say over a bf's daughter. Think of it this way--your kids get to live with HER dad ALL the time. She gets to visit. And you're not even his wife! And he's not even their step dad!
    Never ask or expect a man to choose you over his blood.
    Consider supporting YOUR kids and YOURSELF and not cohabitating with anyone til your youngest is 18.

    Answer by MamaMia9999 at 11:06 PM on Jul. 1, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.