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Consequences

My 13 yo dd went to a movie with a friend and turned her phone off while they walked around the mall. Our rule is have your phone on. She puts it on vibrate most of the time so she can't even FEEL the call. How would you consequence this and if I take the privilege of going to the mall how long would it last?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:31 AM on Jun. 29, 2011 in Tweens (9-12)

Answers (9)
  • I do the same thing with my daughter. If this was a first time mistake, I'd let her know how bad this bothered you and let her know that next time, if it happens again and you can't reach her, your coming to get her and she wont be allowed to go with her friend to the mall or anywhere else until she can properly learn how the phone works! My daughter knows I'd better be able to get ahold of her or moms coming to find out why! I also get the number of her friend she is with as a back up.I wouldn't have been so harsh the first time, she may have forgot to turn it back on after the movie.It's good you check on her, I see so many parents that don't!

    anichols1

    Answer by anichols1 at 6:47 AM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • I would either take away mall privileges or take the phone away. Buy her one of those phones that you can only dial 4 numbers on...like the cops, mom, dad, and 911....then she might have more incentive to keep the "cool" phone on longer. I wasn't even allowed to have a cell phone until I could pay for it myself.
    AF4life

    Answer by AF4life at 7:15 AM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • I am not sure that I would punish her this time. If this is her first time and she shut it off at the movies and forgot to turn it back on that is one thing. I think I would sit down and have a long conversation with her as to why you want her phone on. Then I would explain that if it happens again her phone will be taken away for "X" amount of time. If you feel that she shouldn't be able to go back to the mall with her friends until she gets get phone back tell her that.

    Good Luck!
    cornflakegirl3

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 7:27 AM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • If it was a first time Id give a warning. Second offense id ground from the phone and going anywhere for one week.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 7:42 AM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • I would stop her from going, and I would tell her the reason is that she has proven she cannot be trusted to do what she is told. When a child is unwilling to follow simple directions from her parents, she is in no wise ready to be left unattended for any length of time. She is too apt to follow the lead of her friends, so I would just rein her in.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 7:52 AM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • Ok, I'll be the hard ass in the group I guess............This offense is too dangerous to let slide in my opinion. My DD would be walking around the mall for the next month holding hands with her Mommy (ok, maybe not literally holding hands, LOL), but no trips to the mall or anywhere else without adult supervision. No phone and no friends for a week. And that's IF this is her first offense. 2nd offense and I'd tell her that she can try again when she's 14 because she's clearly not mature enough to be without an adult.
    Kimedbs

    Answer by Kimedbs at 8:04 AM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • I agree with Kenedbs, but I already raised teenagers. Of course I wouldn't allow a 13 year old to walk around a mall without a parent at the mall. Maybe not right with me, but I would never drop them off and leave.
    attap5

    Answer by attap5 at 8:18 AM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • I would take the phone away for a week and no mall for 2 weeks. There has to be consequences for bad behavior or she will walk all over you.
    BrendaW.

    Answer by BrendaW. at 4:19 PM on Jul. 1, 2011

  • Tell her that until she could do what she's told she wouldn't be allowed to go to the mall or wherever, you worry about her and aren't trying to be mean but she needs to be responsible
    Momabear455

    Answer by Momabear455 at 4:27 AM on Jul. 12, 2011

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