My dh's mother-in-law had foot surgery and was supposed to recuperate at her sister's house until she healed up. Yesterday I learned that she's gonna be at my brother-in-law's house for the weekend, and he's leaving for the 4th of July weekend. Dh is traveling an hour and a half to stay with her. Kinda the same thing happened a ways back, but it was at her trailer when she had some other surgery.
It seems to me that dh's brother is getting off scott-free when it comes to taking care of his mom while it' s US that gets stuck with everything. When I talk to dh about it he says I'm bitching and doesn't wanna hear it but wont talk to his brother about it. When I asked him last time "what if something more long term happens?" Dh goes "then I'll just move her in." If dh really tried to do that I'll go insane!!!! Am I wrong to not want her to move in?
The other thing I dont get is Dh's side of the family including mother-in-law isnt all that crazy about me but when it comes to being the family nurse suddenly I'm acceptable. Cuz when dh's stepdad had a stroke, dh took care of him while brother-in-law did diddly squat, on top of working AND with a very (still) injured back. After he died, mother-in-law told me on the phone we should have moved him in with us (he was living with a girlfriend who wouldn't take care of him) "just until he found his own place"--like that's supposed to be sooo reassuring. The she thinks we should foot half the funeral bill when brother-in-law said he'd cover it after he wouldn't lift ONE SINGLE FINGER. She didn't help take care of him either.
My opinion is that when mommy gets sick/old brother-in-law should have the majority of the work. It's his job too after all, not just dh's. And I've done my share anyways-I was forced to take care of my Grandma cuz mom wanted all the glory (and the IHSS checks) without having to do any dirty work.
Am I wrong to think brother-in-law should help? Starting to resent him and dh-and dh says I dont have a right to say anything.
The whole family should help. It is never easy and for the most part probably very inconvenient but family is family.
Answer by Dahis at 9:46 AM on Jun. 29, 2011
Answer by samurai_chica at 9:47 AM on Jun. 29, 2011
Answer by geminilove7717 at 9:55 AM on Jun. 29, 2011
Answer by momto4girzls at 9:56 AM on Jun. 29, 2011
Answer by momto4girzls at 10:12 AM on Jun. 29, 2011
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