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Why are you a SAHM? or Why do you work outside the home?

Is it a matter of choice for you or is it something you have no control over? Do you wish it could me the opposite for you? I can't really work outside the home because childcare is an issue for me, however I don't really want to work outside the home. I enjoy my time with my kids and the freedom I have to do what I want to do when I want to do it and I don't have to answer to a boss... ex: I dont miss any of the school functions or anything else for that matter =) because I have to work. When I was working outside the home I felt like I was missing out on alot.


Asked by SWEETPEAS3MOM at 12:51 PM on Jun. 29, 2011 in Parenting Debate

Level 20 (8,512 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (90)
  • I am a SAHM because that is what works best for our family.

    Answer by pookiekins34 at 12:52 PM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • I find it immature of sahm's to criticize working moms and accuse them of not raising their own children. To me this signifies they are either not happy with their choice or just jealous.  If you're that insecure in your choice, maybe you need to revaluate.  


    Answer by Mom2Just1 at 7:47 PM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • I work outside the home, and yes, I wish I could stay home with my children. But, bills have to get paid.

    I can't stand the statement "I don't want someone else raising my children". That's ridiculous. I raise my children, regardless of me working outside the home. I am the one that teaches them appropriate behavior, morals, beliefs, etc, etc. When they go to school and/or daycare, they teach them academics, and the appropriate behavior while in school. They do not raise them, they look after them while I am away. People who work at daycares could also teach some parents a great deal on how to "handle" their children too.

    Answer by MeandMyBabes at 1:27 PM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • That may be true, yet I fail to see it's revelence. Here's what I'm teaching my girls that it very obviously is not being taught to the majority of people at all today: responsibility, pride, independence, self sufficiency, work ethic, and contribution to something more than themselves. You may not have had kids so others could "raise" them, but I didn't have kids for others to pay for. If something happened to my husband or if we divorced, my girls and I would be just fine and there would be no period of adjustment to a different kind of life or worries about how we'd get food on the table or even a prom dress. I assure you my kids are loved every bit as much as yours and they are being raised to know how to take care of themselves instead of thinking anything in life is owed to them. I happen to think that's an invaluable and immeasurable gift to the kids I love every bit as much as you love yours.

    Answer by PTmomma3 at 4:03 PM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • The sad thing is that to judge a mom by employment or non-employment is just oppresive. It seems like if you work, people say you are a bad mom, and if you don't work, people say you are a bad mom. Why is that?

    We should pat ourselves on the back more, like our male counterparts. ;)

    Answer by ImaginationMama at 4:49 PM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • I work outside the home because I have to; I am the primary breadwinner in our household. While I would like to be home more, I don't think I could be a complete SAHM. And I agree with previous posters - We raise our children, not the daycare people. Just because I'm not there 24/7 doesn't mean I don't have the greatest impact on my son.

    Answer by hootie826 at 2:09 PM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • That's true ImaginationMama. I don't think working or not working makes one a bad parent at all. I do disagree with the statement of working parents not raising their children, as I mentioned. As a pp mentioned, would that mean the father isn't raising the children if they work and the mother stays home?

    I work, but I also volunteer at school, I go on field trips, I plan birthday parties, I do crafts, I'm the den leader for my son's Scouts, I clean, I cook, I read to my children, or have them read to me, we play games, we go on picnics, I tuck them in, I bathe them (or help them), I teach them, I do homework w/them, I take them to dance class and karate class, and I take karate with my son, I am always there when my children need me, and will drop anything for them. So, while it doesn't really bother me if one thinks I'm a bad mom for working, since they obviously don't know me, it is an inaccurate assumption.

    Answer by MeandMyBabes at 5:13 PM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • I work. I have no desire to be a sahm. My husband and I always agreed we would both work and contribute to the finances in our home. We both agreed that both parents would raising our son and give him all the opportunities we can give him. I like my career and love having Summers off. It is flexible, i still attend functions, soccer games, etc. You will find my husband and I at soccer games/practices every time. My son is learning that both parents work and pull their own weight in this family. My son has private school, nice vacations, sports, camps,etc because we both work. My son is loved and being raised by both parents. I find both parents are important in raising a child. Just because someone stays home with their child does not mean they are the better parent. Not by a long shot.

    Answer by Mom2Just1 at 7:45 PM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • SAHM - we don't want someone else raising our children.

    Answer by happymom353 at 12:54 PM on Jun. 29, 2011

  • I see no point in paying someone else to raise my children when I can do it from home, plus, no job understands "my child is sick" for the 5th day in a row well.

    Answer by zoejains_momma at 12:55 PM on Jun. 29, 2011