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how bumpy was your first year of marriage?

we fight so much. i mean alot. he's very picky about everything and has a tendency to correct me at everything i do, n then lecture at everything i'm supposed to be. whats worse... im a perfectionist.. so i do things right the first time, every time, except he wants things done his way. MY MOTTO: "who cares, as long as it gets done right." he wants things don asap, when i ask him to do something.. weeks -months.yeah he stalls, if i ask him something , he mumbles his way out of the conversation, then slips outta the room. if i need him to get something fast, he'll walk around n do a million things before what i need.he isn't lazy, but whatever i want always seems unnecessary. if it was one of my inlaws, he'll do what they ask in a heart beat. and hes so defensive about his family. if i say anything, not something mean, he'll totally look at me like i'm trying to attack. its been a year. will marriage get better

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:54 AM on Dec. 15, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • Yes honey it will well it did for me!! it took time for me and my hubby to get used to the way each other did things and he probablly feels by you assking him to do something you are making him feel less of a "MAN" dumb I know!!! You sound just like me and my husband but we got over the lil piddle things and now we just fight about his MOTHER lol she hates me and tries to break us up every chance she gets!! it gets better you just have to learn both of you i mean to not fight or get your feelings hurt or get mad about the piddle crap cause it is not worth it!!! Hope this helps!!
    proudmama9128

    Answer by proudmama9128 at 2:39 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • Very, we didnt make it past 8 months.
    CassandraLeeMN

    Answer by CassandraLeeMN at 2:41 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • Our first year was *SO* difficult. It got much better for us though. We've been married 17 years now and get along great. (Most of the time anyway. *grin*) We eventually learned what was worth fighting over and what wasn't. I'll give you an hint. Very little is really worth fighting over. We learned to let go of all the little stuff and deal with our differences.
    jessradtke

    Answer by jessradtke at 2:48 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • I think you should maybe look at a marriage seminar or counseling. Communication is key. The first year is hard but if you don't communicate and let things slip because you "think" they will work themselves out, they dont always do. I watched these dvds with my husband called "Love is a Decision' and things have turned around. He has to be open to fixing the relationship though. Good Luck. The fist year few months in my pregnancy were hard because of my hormones clashing with his. we had to work through it but it took dual effort.
    Fallon_Long

    Answer by Fallon_Long at 3:06 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • Were going on 2 years and it's only getting worse. This stuff builds up you know! Solve the problems now and you won't have to deal with them later. Unfortunately my DH has not let up with his issues so we are getting worse. I told him if this continues we will not be married by year 5.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:12 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • It was VERY bumpy! But with patience, compromise, and communication we worked through it. We've been married for 16 1/2 yrs now :-)
    sailorwifenmom

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 4:32 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

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