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Would you be offended?

My cousins are 11 and 7. Every year I send them Christmas gifts. My son was born in August and aunt and uncle haven't sent so much as a card. Plus, when they got thier gifts this year I never heard a word about it. My mom thinks it's unfair of me to hold it against them because I shouldn't be upset over gifts.


Asked by MAUREEN55 at 9:06 PM on Jul. 12, 2008 in General Parenting

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This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • It might be time to stop the gifts. Have they always been like this--not sending thanks or calling? It is up to their parents to instill these customs, but you aren't wrong for feeling under-appreciated. I don't send gifts to cousins, only at Christmas. Since you have your own child, maybe you could stop their gifts and see what happens?

    Answer by Teachermom01 at 3:10 PM on Jul. 13, 2008

  • I think in this case your Mom is right...I would be offended but it would be at the Adults in this case. I would not take it out on the children. Withholding gifts from them because their PARENTS didn't do the same for yours would be punishing the children.

    With that said, there is nothing wrong with calling after an extend period of time and questioning if the children received their gifts or if they liked them.

    Answer by SAHMinIL at 9:21 PM on Jul. 12, 2008

  • I'm not upset with the kids AT ALL. They have nothing to do with it. I don't even blame the kids for not thanking me. I'm hurt by my Aunt and Uncle.

    Answer by MAUREEN55 at 9:27 PM on Jul. 12, 2008

  • With that said you have every right to be hurt... I mean you gave thought to their children and it would nice to receive that back... I'm glad you hear that your are NOT upset with the children. Like I said I wouldn't withhold or not give them things because of their parents...only because they can view it as THEY did something wrong.... :) It's just ashame that so many people don't even know what etiquette is any sending out thank-yous for gifts.

    Answer by SAHMinIL at 10:35 PM on Jul. 12, 2008

  • I have the same problem with my family. I send gifts to my three little cousins and I don't get so much as a thank you from their parents. And they too don't send anything to my daughter.

    Answer by bellalatina81 at 10:55 PM on Jul. 12, 2008

  • I've been there. My DD has 4 sets of grandparents, and 4 uncles/aunts. Before she was born I sent birthday cards to everyone every year. When my DD turned one, only 3 of her grandparents sent her a card. I couldn't believe it! I was really hurt. It's been nearly a year and I have come to terms with it. I also don't expect any cards this year. For my own sake, I had to forgive and move on.

    Answer by kaycee14 at 11:44 PM on Jul. 12, 2008

  • I understand how you feel. I have a 4 yr nephew and a 13 yr old neice. I always buy them b-day and christmas gifts. My brother and his wife has never purchased my kids anything. It aggravates me to death. But I continue to buy for my neice and dephew because its not their fault that their parents are so selfish!

    Answer by redtang912 at 12:49 AM on Jul. 13, 2008

  • Children learn from their parents and it's not their fault their parents aren't teaching them any manners, i would send the gifts just don't ever expect a thank you.

    Answer by sammiesmom2000 at 11:39 AM on Jul. 13, 2008

  • I dont think i would be so offended about not getting anything but there is this cool invention called a telephone and i would be mad if i didnt even get a thank you merry christmas

    Answer by rachel_07 at 12:57 PM on Jul. 13, 2008