Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Sleep overs - why or why not...

I have never seen an issue with Sleep overs. I think they are great! If someone were willing to take my kids for the night I'd jump at the chance. I was reading some answers to a question though and was SHOCKED at the amount of women that said they don't allow their kids to do sleep overs... Why? I'm not bashing I'm just wondering what's wrong with sleep overs? Was there some mommy memo I missed about the dangers? My mother never let us do that stuff but that's because she didn't let us go places with people of different religions, she is JW, so EVERYONE is a different religion. And she's crazy... So... But I don't get why so many of you don't allow them... Can some body tell me?

Answer Question
 
SabrinaMBowen

Asked by SabrinaMBowen at 8:47 AM on Dec. 15, 2008 in General Parenting

Level 40 (122,988 Credits)
Answers (16)
  • there isnt anything wrong with it, as long as the other mother makes sure they dont cause any trouble.
    Chazzms

    Answer by Chazzms at 8:52 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • Hey Sabrina! Did you get my e-mail?

    I don't let my kids do sleep overs b/c #1. two of them have epilepsy. #2. there are too many variables and opportunities for problems with behavior, possible sexual inappropriateness, etc.
    I don't allow other kids to sleep over at my house either due to the same thing and I don't want to be held accountable for someone elses' child.
    Babylove76

    Answer by Babylove76 at 8:54 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • My kids always loved sleepovers (and still do). I truly think you have to pick battles, and if you don't give them enough leeway you get gigantic rebellion. The battles I choose are....no alcohol, drugs, smoking, inappropriate sexual behavior, stealing, cheating, lying, abusing physically or verbally. The battles I don't choose are choices in personal style, music, hobbies, etc, as long as they don't violate the battles I do choose. As they get older, if you don't decide what's really important and not, you are asking for a constant battle.

    And sleepovers are fun. :-)
    romalove

    Answer by romalove at 8:56 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • I will allow kids to stay at my house, but I will not allow my child to sleep over at another house. My mother was the same way. We are very strict about diet and putting garbage in our bodies as well as what activities and television programs we allow. It's not that I don't trust my kids, I just don't trust other people.
    navy-wife

    Answer by navy-wife at 9:02 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • I would allow a sleep over but I would have to be familliar with the home. I probably wouldn't have had a problem at all if I hadn't of been in the line of work I am in. I grew up going over friends' homes and them comming over to mine. I loved it. I want my children to have the same experience. On the other hand I worked in rape crisis and domestic violence for a few years. That scared the shit out of me. So many little girls/teens going to a sleep over and then dad of the friend (or a brother or whatever) molests the kid. Sick. And of course other safety issues like guns available to children in the home ect... So I will be much more aware of the home my child will be spending the night over. I wish I could be more trusting but I just am not.
    frogdawg

    Answer by frogdawg at 10:13 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • I agree with romalove. As long as you know the parents and have a phone number where they can be reached and of course know where they live I don't see it as a problem. If you know them and know they will supervise I don't see it as a problem. I grew up going to friends houses and them coming to mine and loved it. I feel like teh children would feel left out if a friend if theirs was having a sleepover and wasn't aloud to go. The children would go to school talking about all the fin but the other child wasn't there so they miss out on that too. Now I wuld NEVER let my DD go to someones house I haven't met. That is a totally different story.
    CourtneyAnn8690

    Answer by CourtneyAnn8690 at 10:23 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • I'm all for slumber parties! I loved them when I was young. My dd is only 18 months, so obviously she's not going yet. But as long as I've been introduced to the partents and know the child, I don't see any problems.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:59 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • My kids do sleepovers all the time. I pick families that I trust and we swap kids once in a while. It's actually been a blessing; my kids have families that they can stay at in case of emergency. We've had a couple of emergencies, and my friends have too, and the kids are comfortable and well-cared for. It's nice to know I have a support system in place.
    mancosmomma

    Answer by mancosmomma at 11:31 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • I am actually anxious to let my 2 year old, of course when she is older, go to sleep overs. I don't care about religion at all as long they don't try pushing something on someone else. I feel that should only be discussed when asked. I would first want to meet the parents and see their home. Just to be on the safe side anyways. There is so much going on in the world today and you have to be careful who to trust. Some people are just sick in the head. So yes my daughter will be allowed to go to sleepovers. She will also have her own sleep overs too. That will be an exciting time in my daughters life.
    DAH02

    Answer by DAH02 at 11:55 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • I just posted this answer in another question about sleep overs. Yes. We have allowed their friends to sleep over as well as ours have gone to them. We've met the other parents and explained the 'rules" to all of them (meaning ours) such as keeping your/their friends hands and feet to your(them)self, no inappropriate language, acting or touching and ABSOLUTELY NO SECRETS. We have also let the other parents aware of what we've told ours so that we're all on the same page and they're glad we did/do. And I think that it's because of these steps, our children have never had any problems with their friends being at our house or vice versa. IMO, it's the parents responsibility to "feel out" the situation before you let your children take part in it.
    LovingParent08

    Answer by LovingParent08 at 12:07 PM on Dec. 15, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN