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What should I do?!

I worked until I was about 7 months preg. then the doctor told me I shouldn't work anymore bc it was starting to get really cold & with the flu going around he didn't want me to catch it. (I teach Kindergarten) Plus he said my blood pressure keeps rising not high enough yet to be considered preeclamptic but its getting there so he wanted me to be on moderate bedrest. Well with me not working that makes my DH the sole provider. The other day I had to go pick something up for my DD nursury I called him & said I just spent however much it was don't remember & before he could let me tell him what it was he yelled saying "Are you serious - quit spending MY money without asking me CONTD

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Asked by Anonymous at 9:29 AM on Dec. 15, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • ." That really hurt me bc when I was working it was OUR money. It's not like I just got lazy & quit. I have every intention of going back to work after I have her. He has even said it about my car now tho. He said I make the payments it's MY car. I don't understand. What should I do?!

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:29 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • I would have a serious talk with because that is BS. It was OK when you both were working and now it's not! Uh no, no way.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:31 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • Wow sounds like he is being a real ass. What ever happened to "what is mine is ours"? You guys are married, whether you are working or not, it is still your money too! It's not like you are being lazy and trying to live off him and waste all the money he brings in, show him how much you have contributed and make sure he knows your intention of returning to work.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:35 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • I've tried talking to him. He says he doesn't mean it but with us having a baby on the way money is tight. I told him it's not like im going out on a shopping spree buying things for me. I had to buy her a changing pad! I mean come on. He apologizes but still the fact that he said it bothers me. If he got hurt at work which he works in construction so it's very possible I would never say that to him.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:39 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • It sounds to me like you're seeing some true colors. I was out of work longer than I expected to be because I had preeclampsia. Money was tight but purchases still needed to be made. Your husband needs to understand that the only thing that is his are his drawers! You are a unit and if he doesn't understand that he can kick bricks.

    Answer by micrespo at 9:45 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • I would give him a break, I'm sure being the sole provider right now is stressful. He probably has it running through his head all the time how he will support you guys once the baby comes. So give him some time. Try to ignore his comments, but if it keeps up even after baby comes, and you go back to work. Then you should have a more serious talk. I am a SAHM and I always apologize to my DH when i spend a significant amount, because I always think it's HIS money. He says it's ours don't worry about it but sometimes I still feel bad. I stress about it being HIS money just like your husband is on the other side of things stressing because it's HIS money.


    Answer by Navymama at 10:31 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • With winter weather coming on, he knows that money is going to get really tight, or tighter. My hubby is in construction too and we clamp down tight during the winter. I buy all I can during the rest of the year to get us prepared for winter. When I was pregnant, I made a list at the beginning of the pregnancy and started buying all I could to get ready. I'm a bit nuts about it, but for me it's easier to do a little here and little there. He doesn't mean to hurt you, he's just worried about the money right now. So hard to lose an income.

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 11:14 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

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