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Why won't my toddler warm up to my boyfriend?

I have been dating this guy for a while and we fully plan to spend our lives together however there is one major issue. My 18 month old daughter seems to hate him. She won't show him any type of affection and screams whenever he tries to get close to her. She loves everybody else in his family but she just cant seem to like him. Even worse is that every time him and I show each other any kind of affection she gets really angry and forces herself in between us

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Jaidynsmommy125

Asked by Jaidynsmommy125 at 9:34 PM on Jul. 12, 2008 in Toddlers (1-2)

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Answers (8)
  • If it's been just you and her all this time she might be jealous of him and think that he's going to take away her mommy....It is kinda similar to how children at times react to a new baby brother and sister.... I really don't know what to suggest to help with that...but that could be what's going on.....
    SAHMinIL

    Answer by SAHMinIL at 9:44 PM on Jul. 12, 2008

  • i know thats the problem, i just need suggestions on how to fix it
    Jaidynsmommy125

    Answer by Jaidynsmommy125 at 10:05 PM on Jul. 12, 2008

  • The only real thing I got is more one on one with her...or do things with her and him...like parks, walks, reading together...so she can see that she can "share" mommy....

    Oh and group hugs and kisses... My kids love those always have for as long as I can remember...they are 6 and 7... I didn't really have the huge sibling issue because my kids are only 10 months apart that's why I'm more clueless on it.
    SAHMinIL

    Answer by SAHMinIL at 10:13 PM on Jul. 12, 2008

  • I would suggest more one on one with HIM, she needs to get to know him better and bond, and build a trusting relationship. Start out slow, get him to read a book and build up from there, but remove yourself from the situation or room, start with 5 minutes for a couple of days, then 10, and so on. Run an errand to the grocery store and leave them together.. She'll warm up, it'll just take time.
    s.c.a.r.l.e.t.

    Answer by s.c.a.r.l.e.t. at 12:09 AM on Jul. 13, 2008

  • sounds kinda like she is jealous that this other person is getting mommies attention now. its not just all about her. i dont really know what to do about that, since my kids dont really have jealousy issues, and it was just about spending more solo time with them if it did crop up. maybe making it so that ur all spending time together, not just u and her, or u and him, like go outside and all of u play or something.
    kissmiss213

    Answer by kissmiss213 at 1:20 AM on Jul. 13, 2008

  • Hi this is actually the guy in question for this post. we've been trying to do exactly that. i try to take her to the pool in our complex, I try to read to her, play with her, spoil her a bit, yet any time I try to get her to come to me she screams and runs to someone else (anyone else). Including MY parents whom shes only known for a few days.

    If her mom is in the room when we put her to bed she will scream for her for hours straight and refuse to sleep. the only time the baby would take comfort from me is when I'd actually climb into the playpen with her and cuddle her so she'd sleep. but if hr mom says a peep shes up and screaming for her immediately.

    I know this is partly a jealousy issue but I've dealt with that before with my ex and her child. This seems to be much more.

    HELP

    Jaidynsmommy125

    Answer by Jaidynsmommy125 at 1:26 AM on Jul. 13, 2008

  • Could she be sensing somthing about him that your overlooking? This happened to me when I was a kid, everyone thought this guy was great adn I could tell right off the bat somthing was off.
    dreyamom

    Answer by dreyamom at 2:51 AM on Jul. 13, 2008

  • no ,he really is a wonderful man who adores here
    Jaidynsmommy125

    Answer by Jaidynsmommy125 at 3:59 PM on Jul. 13, 2008

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