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When do you delay kindergarten and when do you start on time?

Assume that a child must be 5 before September 1st the year they start kindergarten.

Situation 1: You have a daughter born in late August, so she will just barely make the cut-off. She seems somewhat academically advanced for her age and she's tall for her age. Would you start her to kindergarten on time or hold her out an extra year?

Situation 2: You have a son born in late August, so he will just barely make the cut-off. He has a speech delay, but otherwise seems to be pretty much on target with academic skills. He's about average height for a boy his age, and very thin. Would you start him to kindergarten on time or hold her out an extra year?

Situation 3: The children in situations 1 and 2 above are twins. Would you start them both in kindergarten on time, hold them both out an extra year, or start the girl on time and hold the boy out an extra year? 

I am leaning towards holding them both out an extra year, but my husband is worried that our daughter will be bored if we do that. What are your thoughts?



Asked by TweenAndTwinMom at 3:12 PM on Jun. 30, 2011 in

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Answers (10)
  • Given those circumstances, I would put both of them in at the same time.

    But if you're considering not putting them in now, wait a year and homeschool them with basic stuff to help keep your daughter from being bored. The leg up before the official start of kindergarten will be beneficial.

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 3:14 PM on Jun. 30, 2011

  • I would send them both. They have the cut off day for a reason. Many kids fall within those days and do well. Having a speech problem gets better when addressed in the Kindergarten setting. There are kids of all shapes and sizes in every class. There heights shouldn't have anything to do with choosing to put them in school right now or not.

    Answer by keisha613 at 3:19 PM on Jun. 30, 2011

  • 1. send her
    2. hold him back
    3. ?? I understand the -if you hold her back and what if even next year she is well more advanced than he, its hard to say, but eventually you will have to individualize them and this may be the time- early on so not to be such a big deal in the future. From experience I would not send a boy who was not 100% ready to go.

    Answer by 2teens2LOs at 3:18 PM on Jun. 30, 2011

  • It would depend on the school and the teacher to me. A good teacher meets children at whatever developmental level they've reached and can plan activities and experiences that benefit a wide variety of children.

    IMO, a crappy teacher has the exact same goals and expectations for children, in which case i would keep my child out as long a possible.

    Answer by UpSheRises at 3:19 PM on Jun. 30, 2011

  • If you're not comfortable with your child being in kindergarten you don't set them up to fail. Give them extra time and confidence.

    Answer by sugamama3 at 3:31 PM on Jun. 30, 2011

  • Teachers and educators would rather you wait. My son missed the cut-off by 6 weeks. 95% of the 100+ responses I got when asking to put him in early or wait said: WAIT. Those answers came from educators, parents that put their kids in early, adults that were put in early as kids, the whole gamut.

    I waited with my son and 99% of the time am glad I did.

    Answer by Rosehawk at 3:51 PM on Jun. 30, 2011

  • I would wait till spring to worry about it, but it sounds like I would send them, as by then, your son may have improved greatly in his speech, and other areas,and if thats the only major reason, then I'd send him. If you send her and not him, it may make him feel not good enough, and set him up for peer problems(why is your sister in a higher grade than you?)...either way, send them at the same time.

    Answer by minimo77 at 6:53 PM on Jun. 30, 2011

  • Didn't your school district do kindergarten screening? That should tell you which level they both fall in.

    Answer by sugamama3 at 3:33 PM on Jun. 30, 2011

  • My twins will be 4 this August, so we don't have to make a decision about whether to register or not until next spring. If a child is the right age, they automatically qualify. There are no placement or readines screenings. We have to make this decision on our own. If my twins had been born closer to their due date the decision would be made for us because their birthdate would have fallen after September 1st and they would have waited a year to start.

    Comment by TweenAndTwinMom (original poster) at 3:45 PM on Jun. 30, 2011

  • I don't see that their height or weight is an issue either, but it is something that has been brought up by a lot of people I have discussed this with. They say that my daughter may tower over her classmates if we hold her back, but my son will probably blend in better size-wise if he waits out a year.

    My son is in private speech therapy now, and according to the therapist who saw him in the birth to 3 program through ECI, the private therapist I pay for now is a better option for him than what he will receive at a public school. I don't have a problem with either of them being average, but I do want them to get off to a good start.

    Comment by TweenAndTwinMom (original poster) at 3:57 PM on Jun. 30, 2011

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