Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

bribs or inccentive???

i have two children 3 and 5 when i take them grocery shoping i go staraight to the toy section they each pick out a toy to play with while i am shopping,, if they are good through the entire shopping "experience" they get to keep it if not it goes back on the shelf? is it bribing ?? what's your thought???

Answer Question

Asked by boyer94 at 11:55 AM on Dec. 15, 2008 in General Parenting

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • thats bribing your kids need to learn to be good because it is what is right not to get something.

    Answer by Lyndall at 11:57 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • CONT' and if it is bribing .. is it a bad thing to teach them ? that if they behave they will recieve a prize??? maybe i am making a bad choice... asking cause the other day i asked my son to clean his room he asked what i would give him if he did??? crazy kids... any opinion?

    Answer by boyer94 at 11:59 AM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • You are bribing them. They have come to expect something for behaving in the manner expected. You are lighting a bonfire that will grow out of your control. I would shut it down right now. Tell them we are not going to do that any more. It is their 'job' to listen and do as they are told. Warn them ahead of time that misbehavior will draw a consequence. It will be tough to reverse what you've already started. They will fight you on it. If you don't it will get worse and worse. It is also teaching them that the world owes them something for just being 'good'

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 12:03 PM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • In my opinion, you are bribing them and it is a bad habit to get into. They need to know that they need to behave out of obedience and because it is the right thing to do. Otherwise, you are going to raise greedy kids who only do something for what they can get out of it.


    Answer by Mishelly728 at 12:09 PM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • I have to use rewards/consequences with my DS (autism). I expect him to listen to me because it is the right thing to do, but when he does the right thing I give him a treat. It can be traveling his favorite route home or buying him a box of cookies. If he doesn't behave it's business as usual, he doesn't get a treat. It may be bribing, but it helps me with my son. I think the older they get and understand the less you have to do this. 


    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 2:01 PM on Dec. 15, 2008

  • It's definitly bribing. Children need to learn to behave because it's what's appropriate not to get a prize.

    Answer by micrespo at 3:25 PM on Dec. 15, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.