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Is it too soon?

I've been with my boyfriend for 8 months and we were fighting. Everything is fine now... Great actually!
Anyway, he's been talking about us getting a place together! We'd have to save some money, so it'd be a few months, but do you think it's too soon to even be talking about this?

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Asked by Tink05215 at 9:16 PM on Jun. 30, 2011 in Relationships

Level 14 (1,362 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • Not if it feels right. My man moved in with me instantly. We got married and life is great.

    Answer by emmyandlisa at 9:19 PM on Jun. 30, 2011

  • I don't know. If you feel comfortable then do it.

    Answer by lowencope at 9:20 PM on Jun. 30, 2011

  • what specifically do u guys fight about ?
    is he your babys dad or not ?
    is he a good role model for your kiddo ?
    when u guys fight is he verbally abusive?
    does he have steady income ?
    a little more back ground info would help answer the question.

    Answer by gwen20 at 9:20 PM on Jun. 30, 2011

  • I think every relationship is different and you have to trust yourself. If you think its too early, its to early. If you're just recently getting alone better, then enjoy that for a while before shacking up. If you're going to be together long term, then there should be no rush to move in. However, my DH and I moved in together just 5 months after we started dating, and directly after a major fight and 10 day "split". But, we worked it out and have been together for 3 years now. We were married last month.

    Answer by mlmkjw at 9:20 PM on Jun. 30, 2011

  • Me and my now husband moved in together after 6 months and even though we are married now and very happy together I do wish we would have waited longer to move in together...I think it would have spared us ALOT of fighting and arguing....definatly don't do it if it doesnt feel right but also be sure that you both go into it knowing what the other expects out of the new arrangement...discuss chores, finances, and ground rules ahead of time or you're going to have a rough time of it for the first couple of months (or year in our case) good luck to you mama

    Answer by Lucky209 at 9:24 PM on Jun. 30, 2011

  • Gwen---- We were fighting because I was keeping a secret from him that was affecting our relationship... My ex (baby daddy) raped me and I haven't gotten over it. Anyway, he was mad because I wouldn't talk to him. And I brought up how he never tells me anything either. Anyway, we were fighting for a couple days and had a long talk. Now everything is fine and he's understanding.
    He is not my son's father, but he's the only "father figure" he's ever known.
    He's a great role model for him. That's a big reason why we're together. He's responsible, watches his language around him (he's learning to talk), and he hides that he smokes cigs and drinks beer once in awhile. Personally, as long as my son isn't smoking or drinking, it isn't a big deal.
    He's not abusive in anyway. He's a really sweet guy.
    We both do. I have a minimum wage job, so we wouldn't have anything fancy. And he was recently promoted to Manager in Training.

    Comment by Tink05215 (original poster) at 9:31 PM on Jun. 30, 2011

  • Ah, we moved in together in about 7 months. I don't think it's an unreasonably short period of time.

    Answer by JackieGirl007 at 9:32 PM on Jun. 30, 2011

  • well i would give it a little more time if i were u. that does not mean your guys cant spend time together but just to be on the safe side i would observe him a little bit longer. he sounds like a good guy with a good head on his shoulders, and he has earned major brownie points for being there for your kid. the reason i would recommend you wait a little while longer is that when he moves in that is such a big step, and he is going to be round your son a lot. you want whats best for your son. i think that you need to see him (your boy friend) at his worst before going any further. right now the relationship is still new and if you have not seen him get mad yet- that means you have not met the real him-you have only met his representative. you need to see how he handles situations when he is very angry, that says a lot about someone because at that moment their guard is down and you get a better view. good luck

    Answer by gwen20 at 10:08 PM on Jun. 30, 2011

  • Moving in together is a big step but if it feels right to the both of you then you know when it's right for you to do so.

    Answer by NikLvsNick at 10:25 PM on Jun. 30, 2011

  • wait

    Answer by benitaapplebomb at 1:40 AM on Jul. 1, 2011

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